Lifestyle

The Most Irritating Text Responses Ever

by Ally Batista

I remember getting my first text message sometime in middle school on my first Kyocera cell phone and instantly becoming addicted. I thought it was the coolest form of communication in the world, and you know what?

It still is. Text messaging is convenient, fun, and a great way to preoccupy yourself. But nonetheless there are certain text messages that make me want to shatter my phone and never receive another text.

"True or Tru"

“Oh, true.” No. What does that even mean? Most of the time when I receive a “true” response text it has nothing to do with what I previously said. For example: if I leave the gym and tell you so, and you reply “Oh, true.” Don’t even expect a reply back. I fucking know it’s true; I just said it. You don’t have to remind me that I’m being truthful.

"K"

This one letter alone is capable of starting a war.  There are no "ifs," "ands," or "buts" about it, if you’re sending someone a “K” text, they’re in deep shit and you want them to know it. "K" texts infuriate me because I would prefer that you just tell me why you hate me at the moment rather than beat around the bush by sending the “K”-- which, of course, leads to me asking what I did wrong.

The only thing worse than a “K” is a “K” with a period at the end. If you ever receive a “K.”, you should probably run for cover.

"Lol"

What the fuck am I supposed to say back to this? I know that you’re not laughing out loud, because if you actually were, you would specify it. And that's beside the fact that what I just said wasn’t funny at all. When someone sends an “lol” response-- nothing but lol--they want to stop speaking to you.

You’ve been irritating them throughout this entire conversation. They don’t hate you enough to send a “K”, but they’re annoyed enough to send an “lol”. Lol can also be added to the end of a one worded response when someone doesn’t know what to say and tries to lighten the mood. It never works though.

"Nice"

Nice is another way to tell someone to go fuck themselves without actually saying it. Nice is a form of thinly veiled sarcasm. If I’m very excited about something, excited enough to tell someone, and I receive “Nice” at the end, I’m immediately trying to find the nearest window to jump out of due to embarrassment.

Call someone and they text back

Perhaps my most hated text message is one I don’t want to receive. Have you ever called someone and that person ignores the call only to text you back four seconds later? This is only acceptable if that person was at work or doing something where they honestly couldn’t answer the phone. But those people who do it without one of those reasons, they suck..

If I called you, it’s for a reason. Either I wanted to discuss something that I didn’t feel like typing out, I’m in a rush or I actually need you for real conversation. You should be flattered that I actually want to speak to you instead of typing out a message. If I had wanted to text you I would’ve, simple as that. Disconnect yourself from texting for five minutes (I know, it’s really hard) and answer the phone.

Elite.

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