The Emotional Roller Coaster Of Checking Your Hidden Facebook Inbox

Last Friday night, my wallet disappeared. In mentally retracing my steps, I could account for it at the birthday happy hour I went to, the pizza place after and the cab I took home.

Then my wallet, in its entirety, mysteriously disappeared (you might say I "lost" it, but it makes me feel better to imagine it vanished from thin air than that I'm culpable in any way).

Anyway, I searched high and low. Under every couch cushion, in every shoe (because why not?), and I even got the medallion number for the cab I took from my bank statement and contacted the driver.

To my dismay, no one had any tips about its whereabouts. So, driver's license-less, health insurance card-less and prideless, I canceled my cards and started carrying my passport around.

Then, I read an article we posted with the most helpful secret I've ever heard. I'm sure by now you all know about Facebook's more subtle "message requests," but GUYS THAT'S NOT THE ONLY HIDDEN INBOX. Apparently Facebook filters messages from strangers, only letting a select few through to your requests section.

And do you know what I found when I finally learned about this third, elusive inbox?


Facebook Messenger
Facebook Messenger

Thank you to this nice civilian and his mom. I've somehow made it a whole week without losing my passport, and now I can finally start taking the subway again (I've refused to buy a new MetroCard out of loyalty to my old one… and frugality).

Once my immense joy subsided and I had told each of my co-workers individually about my good fortune -- I basically became the Third Secret Inbox Spokesperson no one asked for, you're welcome Facebook -- I took some time to peruse what else I had been missing... and my excitement quickly morphed into one giant cringe.

Nestled sweetly in my inbox, as with all things unfiltered on the Internet, were:

Creepy comments...

Facebook Messenger

Unsolicited phone numbers...

Facebook Messenger

...and sale offers for products I'd never want!

Facebook Messenger

Ahhhhh, the world we live in.