Dean's 'Bachelorette' Homecoming Got So Emotional: "I Personally Felt Abandoned"
It's hometown dates week on The Bachelorette, people. And you know this episode was going to come with a slew of drama. They always do.
One of the most intriguing things we learned on last week's episode of The Bachelorette was that Dean Unglert has a complicated family history — a fact that he hasn't mentioned often throughout this season.
Dean had previously told Rachel that his mother passed away when he was just 15, and he later revealed that his relationship with his father and his siblings was permanently changed as a result.
We also learned that he hasn't talked to his dad in about two years, citing his father's lack of emotional support following his mother's death.
In a one-on-one date, Dean said,
He's just not a person who has any bearing on my emotional experience. He's become quite a bit more eccentric. So what I wish you could see is the family I had in my most developmental years of 0-15 and not the family that abandoned me at, like the most vulnerable time of my life.
A fan called Dean out for calling his father — a man of the Sikh faith — "eccentric," saying he's not helping stop any stereotypes surrounding people of the Sikh faith. He was quick to respond to the fan, saying his "eccentric" behavior was not a result of his faith and that he didn't intend to imply that.
The exchange between Dean and his dad — who now goes by Paramroop S. Khahsa and was previously known as Harold "Chip" Unglert — got very emotional, as Dean notes he felt emotionally abandoned by his father after his mother died of breast cancer.
He said to his dad,
I guess my biggest gripe with everything is mom passed away. I was a 15-year-old in my most vulnerable state in my life, and my father and my brothers and my sister, like, none of us came together. Like, came into a moment of solidarity to be like, 'Hey, this sucks for all of us. Let's be with each other and, like, let's build off of this.' There was never that moment.
His dad responded,
Well, you're correct. And I was angry, I mean I was really angry at mom dying.
I remember the exact moment. Tuesday morning, 6 a.m. My TV was off. I remember every single thing about that moment. You walked into my room, you sat on my bed, and you put your hand on my shoulder, and you said, 'Dean, mom died 30 minutes ago.' I remember the exact moment. It wasn't as maternal as, maybe, in hindsight, it needed to be ... but there's still a lot of moments where I like, personally felt abandoned.
His dad responded,
If you really think that was my purpose, then there's really no need to carry this conversation.
He then walked out of the house, leaving Dean sitting on the floor crying. That's when Rachel came in and tried to comfort him, and he told Rachel he was falling in love with her.
On Saturday, July 15, Dean asked viewers of the show for religious tolerance leading up to this week's episode.
His Instagram post said,
Hometowns are 2 days away! ..and I'm asking for a favor: when I said my father was eccentric, I was not referring to his Sikh faith or the turban he wears on his head. I'm not asking you to spare his feelings (or mine) but instead to be cognizant and accepting of the millions of people that belong to the Sikh community. Although he and I are not close, I respect my father's decision to follow his heart and pursue the life he has chosen. Let us not criticize him for his appearance or his beliefs because by doing so we are disparaging an entire faith and culture that includes millions of people. And I know we are all better than that. That is all (for now) #endrant HAPPY SATURDAY PEOPLE
According to Bustle, Dean's father's teaches yoga at Earth Oracle Yoga Studio in Carbondale, Colorado.
We saw Dean's dad saying Dean's stuck "living in the past." Even if Dean is still working through issues from his past, it's good that we finally got to see a deeper, more vulnerable side of him — a side he rarely showed throughout this season.