Um, we need to talk about Chrissy Teigen.
Look, I don't know the model personally or, like, at all, but I have this sick sense she may be having her baby right now.
Wait, bear with me. Let's just look at the facts.
If you're pretty familiar with Chrissy's online presence, you know the girl loves her social media. She tweets about everything, and I mean EVERYTHING.
She constantly updates her followers on the most important (and trivial) things happening in her life. They're usually pretty hysterical, and that's why I freaking love her.
LOL, she kills me.
BUT OK, STAY FOCUSED.
Let's take a look at the last tweet Chrissy sent.
HMMM, yes. Very interesting.
If you look closely, you can see this tweet was sent at 12:55 AM on April 15. As I write this, it is now 12:55 PM on April 15. That means 12 LONG hours passed without a single Friday Chrissy Teigen tweet.
HMMMMMMMM, VERY INTERESTING. What could she possibly be doing today that inhibits her ability to tweet?!
The woman basically tweets in her sleep. There must be something very intense or painful or emotional or LIFE-CHANGING happening for her to not be updating her Twitter.
LIKE, MAYBE GIVING BIRTH?!?!?!??!?!
A couple days ago, Chrissy sent this Snapchat of her belly being monitored in what looks like a hospital bed.
Perhaps this visit was to make sure everything looked good in there since the baby was basically on its way?
If I had a million dollars, I'd bet like $200 of it Chrissy Teigen is in a hospital bed right now, giving birth to her baby.
I'm not the only one who knows something is up.
@chrissyteigen You're so quiet today. Hope you're okay! Is it baby time? — Robyn Owsley (@robyn_owsley) April 14, 2016
If Chrissy isn't in labor, then someone buy her a damn charger. I want more tweets, and I want them now.
Chrissy, please give us a sign soon so I can go back to being a real person. I can't concentrate on anything until I get some answers.