Tom Hardy's Myspace Page Was Absolutely F*cking Legendary (Photos)

by Gillian Fuller

It's no secret Tom Hardy's life makes for one epic rags to riches story: The former crack addict is now one of Hollywood's hottest actors.

Before he was showing off his chops on the silver screen, however, Hardy was a celebrity in his own right — on the computer screen.

Enter: Tom Hardy's Myspace.

His page on the once-popular social media network was a gem, full of half-naked photos of the Brit in ridiculous poses, coupled with equally ridiculous captions (such as, "I'm cooking a turkey, yo”).

The page has since been taken down, but the photos live on. Such is the beauty of the Internet.

His “About Me” section was no less hilarious than the bizarre photos and was undoubtedly written while on copious amounts of drugs:

I never lie. If you suck you suck..If you're good I take my hat off and I'm all over you. I'll bend over backwards to help anyone of their word.. f*ck me around I'll let it go I'm not here for stuff I'm here to live and give whatever it is I can to nourish rather than to take and move on, I'm course and straight, I act for a living now adopting characters for money, it is a languague I was born into, I always wanted to be someone else, it isn't rocket science it's easy, now that I've made amends for lying to myself, it is a trade craft nothing more, I pray I don't get caught up “living the dream.” such a lonely place. having said that; your best like my best just isn't good enough. ever, no scarface syndrome here, no resting on laurels, there is always work to do, I'll clean up my side of the street promptly admitting where I am wrong, the work doesn't stop. I'm Grateful, arrogant self centred, tenacious, versatile, honest, honourable, loyal, loving, gentle, consistent, reliable, focussed, prideful, passionate and nuts. I have a head like a disco ball, if I say I'll do something, unless I absolutely can't it gets done, I never give up on humanity, I love people. I want to see communities stand up, honest and open, flexing to the fullest of their capabilities and combined usefullness. happy. I laugh at bullies. I am reactionary but I have learned to hold my tongue and my trigger finger. Man made mistakes take lives from those that deserve to recover in time, there is always another way forward better even if it is around the side or back, I try to find it. the mind is like a parachute it will only work when it is opened. I am often afraid. So I have to share.I want to help, it's not my business to judge, I make mistakes, I stand corrected, I accept casualties and walk with hope because I f*cking LOVE. I could so easily be dead. My head is like a dangerous neighbourhood I should never be in it without an appropriate adult. left to my own devices I'll crash the motor. Religion to me is a neccesssary device for the presence of combined faith, branded for those who want to get into heaven, I have to have faith, but I chose the path of spirituality, spirituality seems to me to be for those who've been to Hell. I don't want to go back there. I am a goldfish walking through a desert. Thank you H.P for my life. I want to work and be useful, be part of the solution and not the problem…what a load of self satisfied smug and charmless tatter x

It's reassuring, in a way, to know such an established, handsome, seemingly put-together actor made his share of questionable life decisions in his youth. There's hope for us yet.

Check out some of the painfully embarrassing photos below, and be grateful you live in an age where memories may fade but evidence never does.

Pre-Hollywood Tom Hardy was the king of Myspace selfies.

Tom Hardy's MySpace profile #neverforget pic.twitter.com/Xp3BtfeSUU — Benjamin Lee (@benfraserlee) May 18, 2015

It's the stuff of legend.

If you're ever feeling down, remember Tom Hardy used to have a MySpace page & he posed hard for it. pic.twitter.com/WN0ud76I5p — Kayleigh Anne (@Ceilidhann) May 27, 2015

This is from the man who played Bane and Mad Max.

To be fair, he was also a crack addict, which could explain the lack of judgement here.

Remember when Tom Hardy had a MySpace? (His actual original caption: x i'm cooking a turkey yo x x) pic.twitter.com/Gizs0VZD63 — Dani (◡‿◡✿) (@chlorrofthemask) May 26, 2015

Hardy was all about those body shots.

Another gratuitous Tom Hardy MySpace picture pic.twitter.com/i2oCLJj8zX — Alex (@AlexEtchells) November 21, 2013

Though his profile has long since been deleted...

Tom Hardy's old MySpace pictures are the funniest things. pic.twitter.com/u7EeAfltEM — beccaruss (@beccalouruss) April 13, 2013

...these photos are forever.

I'm so so so so glad Tom Hardy had a myspace and uploaded terrible pictures of himself to it. pic.twitter.com/9vVelhqZ — Diandra (@diandrasharline) December 23, 2012

And really, thank God for that.

Tom Hardy's old Myspace pictures.... hahahahah pic.twitter.com/0i80inhd — Komz. (@_komzlfc) September 28, 2012

Long live Tom Hardy....

@FANTASTlC420 MySpace Tom hardy is the best there is pic.twitter.com/cdVb3HZKOa — romanova erica (@ROGRSBARNES) May 25, 2015

...and the Myspace memories.

Be careful what you post online, kids. You don't want your nudes to end up like Tom Hardy's old MySpace pics. pic.twitter.com/fxh60YME1E — fetty lentil snap (@kailanthropy) May 26, 2015

Citations: A Reminder That Tom Hardy Had the Best Myspace Profile Of All Time (BuzzFeed)