There are three places I don't want to be this Halloween: a haunted house, any vessel that resembles the one in the movie "Ghost Ship" and Kourtney Kardashian's house.
Please don't invite me to a party at Kourtney's house because I will certainly turn you down. I'LL GO ON GHOST SHIP OVER KOURTNEY'S.
I'm sorry, but her festive decorations are way too scary. I mean, I don't even know if they're just decorations or evidence that Kourtney has opened a portal to the Netherworld and is issuing forth a host of demons at her side.
With All Hallow's Eve fast approaching, Kourtney decided to use Snapchat to document her process of putting up Halloween decorations and EGAD! THEY ARE TERRIFYING.
In addition, she snapped her outfit, which was dark, brooding and plain spooky.
OK, fine, it was just a trendy black Adidas leather jacket.
But Kourtney wasn't the only person sporting a jacket.
Well, in this case it was a former person (*cough, I mean a dead person, cough*).
One of her decorations featured a skeleton wearing a "Pokémon bomber," as Kourtney put it.
THIS IS ME WAITING TO FIND A SNORLAX IN POKÉMON GO.
This Pokémon bomber is so cool it would turn even someone so lame as me into a Pokéballer.
Of course, there were some more macabre installations as well, like this severed head just trying to give ya a little smooch on the mouth hole.
Oh, behave, creepy decapitated head! Jeez, Kourtney... you couldn't find a severed head that doesn't have its eyelids peeled back by chains?
Not to mention these black and white pumpkins that belong in "Pleasantville" or "The Artist."
OK, these are a little more easy to digest visually.
You can watch Kourtney's entire Snapchat video above to get you in the mood for Halloween.