Why You Will Probably Get Back Together With Your Ex, Even If You Shouldn't
Relationships are complicated and none more so complicated than a relationship with an ex.
Whether you try to be friends or cut the person out of your life completely, there is always that lingering thought: "What if we just get back together?" Here are the reasons why you will probably get back together with your ex:
You and your ex share a history. You've had good times and (obviously) bad times. You grew together for some amount of time and hardly anyone knows your intricacies quite like your ex.
He or she knows your favorite movie, your favorite food and your friends. Seems like an awful lot of knowledge to just throw away and never think about again, eh?
All of the time shared together was valuable and the lessons you learned were awesome, so now you're just going to throw all of that away? No shot.
2. Dating Sucks
If you're one of the people who got out of a relationship because you wanted to see other people, oh boy, are you in for a treat. You'll soon come to find that other people are MONSTERS.
People are terrible, and now you have to start all over again. Imagine playing a video game that has no option to save your progress. You get to the final level after years of painstaking precision and dedication and then suddenly, BAM! You lose and have to start all over again.
That is what dating is. Getting back together with your ex is like returning to a save point on a video game. You took a break, turned it off and needed a breather. Now, turn that sh*t back on and get back to where you were.
3. He Or She Cares About You
Unless something crazily horrendous happened, you probably still care about your ex, and he or she probably still cares about you. Once you are back in the dating game, you'll come to find that none of these new people care about you the way your ex does or did.
It is a horrible realization, especially if you were excited to see other people. You'll soon realize that the new people think that your hobby is stupid and don't understand why you need to change your fantasy baseball roster every night, but guess who does understand that?
Likely, your ex does. Your ex knows why it's important to you and why you need to do it, and he or she won't try to convince you otherwise.
Have you ever farted on a first date? Didn't go over too well, did it? Have you ever farted around your ex? No big deal! Sometimes, it’s pretty hilarious.
Your ex knows what makes you comfortable, and you know that you feel comfortable around him or her. So what if you're wearing a dirty t-shirt and your favorite gym shorts from middle school?
Your ex knows that it’s what makes you feel happy and comfortable — and how the ex wants to see you.
I dare you to go on a first date in your favorite shirt and your favorite pants. You can try to say that you like to dress up, but really, wouldn't you rather just lie around in sweatpants with your ex, rather than try to impress some stranger who probably doesn't even like your favorite band?
Now that you've broken up, you have no one to bounce your ideas off. You have no one you can talk about work with. You have no one to tell the story of your day.
It's just you and your thoughts, which can get awfully lonely. As much as you may think you're a great person, even you get sick of you sometimes. Your ex didn't get sick of you.
Your ex would listen to your stupid stories about work and the crazy homeless man you saw on the street and your zany coworker as if they were the greatest stories ever. Now, you don't have anyone with whom to do that.
6. You Still Like Him Or Her
Hey, you dated for a while, right? There has to be something about the person you liked. The crinkle in his nose or the way she laughed?
You were together for a reason and you liked each other at some point, so what is stopping you from liking that person again? Pretty much nothing (except for the reason you broke up).
You'll probably realize that the person was pretty awesome and made you feel happy, and eventually, you'll have that creeping feeling that you want to see him or her again. One thing leads to another and BOOM! You're back in it again, happy as can be.
It's not your fault; sometimes people make mistakes and break up when they don't really need to do so. Maybe, they just needed time to breathe a bit.
In the long run, maybe you'll be much happier if you can make things work with your ex. If not, there's always the option of breaking up...
Photo via Favim