Stocksy

Why Women Shouldn't Be Anti-Porn

It is 10 pm and I am turned on, which usually, wouldn’t be a problem. But, tonight it is because my boyfriend is bartending until 3 am. So, I grab my laptop and log on to one of my favorite porn sites — but I cannot help but to feel a smidge of guilt.

Not only is there a stigma that watching porn is bad, but also, a specific stigma that women don’t enjoy porn unless they watch it with their men. But, many women do actually enjoy this type of adult entertainment and they shouldn’t feel any guilt about it. I find many flaws in the argument that pornography is not beneficial for women; commonly, women harshly judge porn when in reality, many of their gripes are misconstrued.

Check out a few porn misconceptions women need to understand:

Porn Objectifies Women

Porn does sometimes position women to be sex objects, but here’s the thing: in sex, you are a sex object. Sex is not always love and romance — it can just be about lust. In those lustful situations, partners view one another as mostly sexual entities. Also, do you think that women never objectify men? What about those “50 Most Eligible Bachelors” pictures in Cosmo?

Or those boards on Pinterest labeled “dream man” with shirtless photos of Ryan Gosling and Channing Tatum? Just because they’re not naked ladies does not mean they’re not perceived as sexual objects for the lusting pleasure of women. Oh, by the way, porn occasionally also features attractive men who aren’t so rough on the eyes.

Porn Facilitates Unreasonable Bedroom Expectations

First, this completely depends on the type of porn someone watches. Not everyone is into chains, whips and punishment scenarios — and those people don’t expect those situations to unfold in the bedroom. Also, romantic comedies give women outrageous expectations for men not so dissimilar from the expectations men may glean of women from porn. But, this belief translates to women who have read “Fifty Shades of Grey,” who obviously don’t believe all men are like Christian Grey.

They can dissociate fantasy from reality. Not every man will organize a flash mob for you (see: “Friends with Benefits”) or show up in a limo outside your house with a bouquet of roses when you’re mad (see: “Pretty Woman”). Sure, you might not have huge double F boobs that barely move when you’re on top, but at the end of the day, I’m willing to bet that men want a real woman more than ones they can only watch.

Trust me, I watch plenty of porn that features incredibly well-endowed men, but I do not expect every man to look the same.

Porn Has Nothing To Offer Women

After watching all this porn, I’ve learned a lot. Porn has taught me many a trick in bed. Hate to break it to you, but not every guy wants to practice missionary every night. Also, extreme exposure to nudity helped me become more comfortable with my body. Not all pornography features blonde Barbies and sleazy guys who role-play “secretary and boss” scenarios.

Nubile Films, for instance, usually features more realistic representations of couples in romantic environments. My boyfriend and I occasionally watch porn together to spice up our relationship. There are actually a lot of pros to porn if women could get past all of its old-fashioned, socially constructed misconceptions.

Photo credit: Don Jon