Have you ever wondered why you never got that second date, even though you’re sure it was a night to remember (or even a night to try to remember)?
We’ve all been on bad or very questionable first dates.
Obviously, for women, our interpretation of a bad date is when we just don’t click with that cute guy.
He was so nice, but we were really looking for a little more chutzpah.
But, what’s the guy’s interpretation of a bad first date?
Do you ever ask yourself, "Why he didn’t call the next day?" or "What did I do wrong?"
I’ll be the first one to say, we, as ladies, never like to admit when we’re wrong.
But sometimes, very rarely, we do.
So, if you’re asking yourself these questions, you should look back on your date and think about whether or not you've made some of these mistakes:
1. Getting Drunk
Most people would say I’m a shy person, but I like to think of myself as introverted.
Because of my lack of social expertise, I like to drink a bit before going on a date.
There’s nothing wrong with loosening up. However, if you choose to do so, you’ll definitely want to put something in your stomach before downing that chardonnay.
Tip: If you’re already drunk on the date, try not to desperately apologize for your incoherence and incompetent behavior.
2. Forgetting Your Date’s Name
Yes, if you’re already drunk, it might be a little bit more difficult to remember.
But in these tough situations, truly try your best.
Unluckily for me, my date’s name was very similar to my name, which made me look that much more pathetic when I forgot it.
3. Saying How Nervous You Are
For some reason, I think it’s really cute to say how nervous I am on a first date.
Let me tell you something: It’s not cute.
Show your date your confidence, and express the comfort you feel in your own skin.
Your date will appreciate getting to know that side of you a lot more than you would expect.
4. Talking About Your Ex
Talking about your ex in any context is a pretty bad idea, but sharing a little too much about your past on a first date really takes the cake.
Talking about your ex doesn’t allow you to move on to this new person you’re trying to get to know. It will show him or her maybe you’re not so over your previous relationship.
5. Asking Your Date About Previous Dates/Relationships
To be honest, I’m very guilty of this one.
We do this because yes, we’re generally curious. But, we’re also trying to get to know the competition.
Besides seeming nosy, asking about previous relationships can make a woman seem jealous.
Once you’ve gone on a few more dates, you have a right to know about your partner’s past.
But, the first date is about getting to know each other, not getting to know your man’s exes.
6. Street PDA
The first kiss with your date is typically a magical moment, isn't it? Don't ruin it by forgetting there's an audience when you're in public.
On my last date, eventually, we were done with the bar.
Homeboy then proceeded to ask me to take a walk, which is the classic Jewish summer camp way of inviting someone to a make-out session.
I wasn’t ready for the night to end, so I rolled with it.
We walked a few steps out of the bar before he kissed me. The sloppiness ensued shortly thereafter.
We were extremely passionate in the worst of ways. We took our fervor all over the streets of Los Angeles and then right in front of a Jewish synagogue.
Keep it classy, folks.
7. Saying You Need To Lose Weight After Your Date Compliments You
We change our outfits at least three times before going out on a date. We strive to look our best.
But no matter what, our nerves get the best of us. We'll always be a bit self-conscious on the first date.
However, all these insecurities are supposed to stay hidden, especially when your date admires your beauty.
After my date told me how attractive I was, I didn't reply with a simple, “Thank you.”
Oh no, my drunken self replied with, “No, I need to lose 10 pounds.”
Regardless of whether or not I actually feel I should lose the weight, it's definitely not something I need to reveal to a man, especially on the first date.
8. Saying You Brought Pepper Spray
Nothing says, “I thought you might assault me before we met” like telling your date you brought pepper spray.
Obviously, as a woman, it’s 100 percent imperative to bring pepper spray on a date with someone you don’t know.
But with all that being said, you should never tell your date you brought a little extra protection.
If he found out you thought he could be capable of assault, it would probably offend your innocent man.
9. Sex On The First Date
So, this mistake is a little bit more controversial. Some people would argue if you’re feeling it, you should just go for it.
Other people say if you sleep with your man on the first date, he’ll no longer respect you.
He'll be uninterested because you weren’t enough of a challenge.
In my opinion, both perspectives have some truth to them.
If you're feeling it, maybe you should go for it. But then, you can’t expect your date to call the next day.
Maybe he will, and maybe he won’t. You can’t have any expectations.
At the same time, you shouldn’t be discouraged because you think he won’t respect you. If a guy doesn’t respect you, he’s probably not the right one.
10. Telling Your Date You’re “Free Whenever”
If your guy asks you for a second date, you should never respond with, “I’m free whenever” like I did.
Show him you’re in charge, and set a specific date that works for you, even if that’s any day of the week.
Act like you're busier than you are, and let him enjoy the mystery.
If a guy knows you’re always around, he’s going to take advantage of that. So, don’t let him.
I hope you learned a lesson from reading this because I know I did.
Shout out to the poor bloke who inspired this article, and to the innocent men who don’t know what they’re getting themselves into when they take me out in the future.
I apologize in advance.