Relationships

Wake Up, Sister!: A Reality Check For The Girl Who Can't End Things With The Assh*le

by Brittany Armacida

Every girl has that one guy she knows isn't good for her, but for some reason, can't seem to get away from him. If you're that girl, I wrote this to open your eyes.

It's brutally honest, but more importantly, it might actually make you come to your senses. At first it will probably upset you, but in the long run, I promise it will help you.

The first thing you need to realize is a guy's not going to change just because you want him to. He's only going to get better at deceiving you. I know you're sticking around because you're hoping for a change, but the reality is, you shouldn't have to change him.

You need to stop giving in to him, and you need to stop going back to the boy who keeps leaving you in the first place. He's clearly not scared of losing you, and that means something.

I know that he finds a way to win you back, and he says just the right thing at just the right time, but he only says the right things because he's practiced those words so many times to other girls. You can never trust a guy who's that charming.

I also know you think he loves you because every time you two end things, he always comes back. He doesn't love you because he keeps coming back to you; he loves that he has that control over you. He also loves that you'll take him back, no matter what.

When people say love is blind, it's definitely true. You are only seeing what you want to see, focusing on the good things. You may think he treats you okay, maybe that you'll never do better and that you're not just another girl to him.

You think deep down, you really mean something to him, but sometimes the way you perceive someone isn't how he really is.

I know you love him, and you think part of you always will. But the truth is, you love the false idea you have of him and the idea of him changing into who you want him to be.

Let's think about it: Why do you love the idea of someone or something? There are more than seven billion people in this world, and you're hung up on one? Why are you in love with an idea in your head, when you can find someone who is everything you envision within that idea?

There are hundreds of boys just like him, hundreds of boys nothing like him and thousands of boys who are so much better than him. Believe me, in time, you will find someone better than him.

Try as you might, you just can't deny the ongoing debate in the back of your mind, and you need to pay attention to why you're having second thoughts. You know he sucks, but you also know you like him, so you choose to let your feelings win the battle.

As harsh as it might sound, you're being weak and taking the easy way out. Easy decisions are usually the wrong ones. You need to stop letting the things you feel take priority over the things you know. You need to stop settling for him, the fights, the breakups and the disappointment.

If there's one thing in the world you shouldn't settle for, it's who you choose to be with.

When you finally realize it's time to get over him, he'll probably have a lot to say, like "you're a bitch," "you're crazy" or "you're immature." Fine. It's better for you to be all of those things than what he is: a disappointment.

Photo Courtesy: We Heart It