The Good, The Bad And The Ugly Of The Casual Hookup

by Ashley Fern

Causal hookups are basically the norm these days. Whether we like it or not, we go along with it because getting some is better than not getting some -- or at least this is what we falsely believe.

If you really think about it, isn't being alone much better than wondering where you stand with someone at all moments of the day?

Isn't it more frustrating to deal with the back-and-forth inconsistencies than to just be sexually frustrated?

At what point is enough, enough? Are you really still enjoying your current situation or are you just figuratively and literally going along for the ride?

Let's delve into the topic that everyone is all too familiar with: the good, the bad and the ugly of a casual hookup.

Weekday Plans

The Good: You have all the free time in the world to devote to yourself!

The Bad: You know you'd give up that SoulCycle class if he asked you out for dinner.

The Ugly: You'd give up a lot of things if he asked you out for dinner. And by a lot of things, you mean everything.

Weekend Plans

The Good: You finally can send him that first text without worrying about looking like you care too much.

The Bad: Chances are your text will take place after 10 pm.

The Ugly: There are higher chances your text will be comprised of incomprehensible words.

Explaining This To Your Family

The Good: At least they know you're being social to some degree.

The Bad: Once you say it out loud, you realize how stupid your situation sounds.

The Ugly: At the rate you're going, they have absolutely no hope for any grandchildren.


The Good: You don't really feel as if you have anything to lose by contacting him at your discretion.

The Bad: He gives you an inch, you take a mile.

The Ugly: You make up every excuse for him when he doesn't even respond.

Drunk Texting

The Good: You're both drunk so you really can say whatever you feel like without fear of judgment... or rejection.

The Bad: Sometimes you both are too drunk to even coordinate a meet up.

The Ugly: Unless you both are erasing these conversations once they've finished, they will haunt you for days to come.

Dating Other People

The Good: Technically, you can do whatever you want and when has that ever been a bad thing?

The Bad: If you find out he's dating other people, you probably won't be too thrilled, especially when you can put a face to the name.

The Ugly: When you match with each other on Tinder...


The Good: There's no good case to argue against using it.

The Bad: Once you're drunk, all rational thinking has been tossed out the window.

The Ugly: Well, here's to staying positive and testing negative.

Catching Feelings

The Good: This is only good if the feelings are mutual.

The Bad: Chances are they are not or this wouldn't be the situation you're in.

The Ugly: Once someone brings up the "What are we?" question, nothing will ever be the same.


The Good: For those who get anxious about commitment, you basically get to avoid that here.

The Bad: Sometimes you do want a little bit of commitment.

The Ugly: Those little 30 minute panic attacks when you question WTF you are doing with your life.

Paying For Things

The Good: As the female, you can easily guilt the guy into paying.

The Bad: You probably should just be splitting.

The Ugly: This is a sad, sad way to figure out where you stand.

The Introduction

The Good: At least this guy cares enough to meet up with you and your friends.

The Bad: If you hesitate and the guy steps in to take care of the introduction, things can get really uncomfortable.

The Ugly: Introduce this guy the wrong way and that will be the last you ever see of him.

The Greeting

The Good: At least you're hanging out...

The Bad: The awkward shuffle between a hug, kiss on the cheek and handshake is all too familiar for the both of you.

The Ugly: He won't kiss you on the mouth when you're soberly greeting each other, but still expects you to, well, you know...

The Morning After

The Good: You won't be wasting away your entire day because chances are you are going to want to either get out of his place ASAP or kick him out ASAP.

The Bad: The awkward moment that is the "linger."

The Ugly: Is there any non-offensive way to kick someone out of your bed?

Sleeping Situation

The Good: It could be worse, you could not be having sleepovers.

The Bad: A drunken pass out can be completely misconstrued.

The Ugly: The more often these happen, the more awkward they get.


The Good: A guaranteed 2 am rendezvous.

The Bad: Sometimes it's awkward, sometimes it's amazing -- it's always a toss up.

The Ugly: Sober sex.