We all know that sometimes (maybe all the time), women get a little bit crazy near their periods.
In any case, the fact still remains that women may not act like themselves while on their periods. The real problem is navigating your relationship during this special time of the month, when your lovely girlfriend turns into, dare I say, a monster.
So, here are a couple of tips on things NOT to do around the time of (and definitely not during) your girlfriend's period.
1. Say things like, "Are you PMSing?"
Just don't. Just because women know they get a little crazy when Mother Nature's about to come knocking doesn't mean they're going to fess up to it when you ask.
You probably shouldn't ask any question that is similar and explicitly asks about the impending doom that is menstruation.
2. Say you don't want pizza
It's a fact that periods make you hungry. So, if you say you don't want pizza (or anything else that's unhealthily delicious), be prepared for World War III.
Trust me; even the girls most loyal to clean eating will give in to an order of animal fries from In-N-Out because it is just that satisfying.
3. Tease her
Another fun fact is that women are more sensitive near their periods. The usual playful banter must cease while a watered-down version of this banter may take its place. The reason for this is because she might take something you say jokingly to heart.
Unintentional offenses are at a high risk near your girlfriend's period. This is another cause for the next World War III.
4. Not let her control the television
Usually television is like Switzerland: You guys watch a show or movie you both agree on. That means, you don't have to sit through "Pretty Little Liars," and she doesn't have to sit through the latest episode of "Archer."
But when it's that time of the month, if she wants to watch "Grey's Anatomy" and bawl her eyes out, you should probably not fight her on it. Who knows, you might like it, too.
5. Debate things
A healthy debate is not a bad thing; it's a great way to express opinions, feelings and share your worldview with your significant other. But if your girl is near her period, it's probably best not to get her riled up on how she feels about hot topics (or anything, for that matter).
There are a myriad of other things to talk about anyway, like the weather and what she wants to eat for dinner (and dessert).
6. Pass judgment
Sometimes it's a good thing to intervene when someone is nearing the bottom of a brand new pint of ice cream. But if that someone is a woman near or on her period, I strongly encourage you not to say anything at all.
Ice cream is like cough medicine for the soul. If a woman is eating ice cream in front of the TV, watching "Harry Potter" movies like there's no tomorrow, just avert your eyes and continue on with whatever you're doing. You can probably make fun of her for this later.
7. Ask her to do anything
I don't mean women should be treated like prissy princesses during their periods. If you want something done, but don't want to wait for her to do it, just to do it yourself. She'll probably thank you for it. Periods can be energy-consuming with all the cramps and what not.
Plus, less chores to do will probably help her stress levels, anyway, so everyone wins.
8. Run out of painkillers
Painkillers are a lady's best friend during period.
Some side effects of not having pain killers readily available include crying, vomiting and/or intense lower abdominal cramps resulting in laying down in a fetal position.
11. Get caught not listening to her
I know it's not possible to remember every word that ever comes out of your girlfriend's mouth, but if you get caught not listening, be prepared to deal with a very angry girlfriend.
You can at least listen for the gist of what she's saying so the she won't whip out the hammer of Thor.
12. Force her to socialize
Periods and premenstrual symptoms make for very difficult social situations. It's hard for women to socialize when, A) "Am I on my period, yet?" B) "Crap. Did I bring a tampon?" and C) "My tummy hurts so bad," are among the top three things on her mind.
If you live with your girlfriend, don't invite all your bros over to hang out because chances are she doesn't feel like socializing in her own home, either. Plus, periods are awkward, bloody happenings in the bathroom. If you've ever seen a public women's bathroom, you'll know.
13. Smother her
Periods turn women into crazy, moody creatures that either want to eat ice cream and pizza all day or want to die and be left alone for all of eternity.
It's hard to gauge at any moment in time what your girlfriend is feeling, so try not to smother her with your love. I'm sure she appreciates all of the grand gestures of kindness through chocolate bars and Sour Patch Watermelon bags, but it's better to just be subtle.
For example, instead of saying, "Hey! Here's a chocolate bar because I know you're on your period," you should probably just leave it on the kitchen counter for her to find. It's the little things that have the greatest impact during these times.
14. Do nothing
It is not your obligation as your girlfriend's significant other to take care of her during this time of the month where things get a little less easy.
But, it might make all the time in-between periods a lot nicer if you do something to help her during these times of bloody trouble.
15. Skimp on affection
At the risk of being crass, your chances of getting any during this time of the month may be slim to none. Your girlfriend is not going to feel her best because her tummy's cramping, her boobs are hurting and she might be a little bloated.
While PMS is not a real excuse for your girlfriend to act like a total crazy bitch, it is also no excuse for you to show how much you love her less. TLC goes a long way in these scenarios, and I promise it will pay off... eventually.
With that, I conclude what you should not do while your girlfriend is PMSing or, perhaps, already on her period. Good luck and may the odds be ever in your favor.
Photo Courtesy: We Heart It