Will We Be Together Forever? 5 Questions To Answer To Figure It Out
If you think you've met the one you will spend the rest of your life with, you are probably feeling pretty wonderful.
The feeling of "forever love" is unlike any other feeling we humans experience. It's full of energy and happiness — and a lot of the time, we're surprised someone that perfect for us even exists!
My husband and I got married pretty quickly — eight weeks after our first date. We just knew it was right and we were immediately ready to commit.
That said, no matter what the trajectory of your relationship, there are a few questions each partner in a forever relationship should be able to answer with an enthusiastic "Yes!"
If you suspect you've found your person, read on for some things to ask that will help you figure out if it's truly forever:
1. Do I Think They're "The One"?
This one may seem like a bit of a no-brainer, but it's really important.
When my husband and I first got together, we immediately knew that this was it for both of us. Neither of us actually believed in the idea of "the one" before, but as soon as we connected, it was like the way we saw the world completely changed.
Importantly, we were both on the same page at the same exact time — he knew I was the only one for him just as much as I did. And we told each other that!
If you and your partner are really looking toward forever love, you should both be able to definitively say that you are each with your "one." If either of you has any doubt, it may not be the best time to start banking on the rest of your lives. True forever love means you should both think you've found your perfect fit.
2. Do I Trust Them Implicitly?
A forever relationship can't be built without unyielding, implicit trust.
Although my husband and I got married in a brief eight weeks, part of the reason we did so was because we already knew that we trusted each other implicitly.
Of course, more trust builds with time, but we both immediately felt like the other was someone that would never intentionally hurt us. I could tell this about him from the time we had spent together and also from great things other people said about who he was. It was the same for him.
Both parties should be able to answer a big "YES!" to the question of whether they can trust their partner implicitly. The idea of "forever love" might be really romantic, but the truth is it comes with a healthy dose of realism and adulting, too, and trusting your significant other is at the top of that list.
3. Do We Communicate In A Healthy Manner?
Healthy communication means that you and your partner will be able to talk through anything and everything.
I joke with my husband that we talk about everything, all the time. Although we don't actually talk about literally everything, we do talk about a lot, especially the stuff that's vital to keeping our relationship great.
We not only discuss issues that come up, but we also keep each other clued in to what's going on in our heads and hearts — and it's what keeps us connected.
In a partnership that will last a lifetime, both people should feel like they have great communication and can talk about absolutely anything — in a healthy way.
Licensed psychologist Dr. Jennifer Rhodes, founder of Rapport Relationships, says one of the things to remember is that there is no contempt or criticism in healthy communication. "These variables predict an astonishingly high rate of divorce," she says.
If you aren't able to talk about it all, you'll never be able to truly understand each other and work through any problems that may arise.
4. Do I Think We Can Grow Together Over Time?
Being able to look toward the future together is an important element of a committed relationship.
I barely knew my husband when we got married. (An eight-week courtship will kind of do that!) What I did know, though, was important: I knew that the two of us would be open to learning new things about each other and growing together. It mattered if we were a perfect fit now, of course, but it mattered more that we were both committed to growing together later, as a unit, instead of just as individuals.
If you think you are with the person you will spend the rest of your life with, you should both be able to answer "yes" to the question of whether you think you can grow together over time. It's common to get caught up in the now — as in, this particular moment in your relationship — but you should be able to look to the future with your partner just as easily.
5. Do We Have Fun Together?
Fun is too often overlooked as a component of truly great relationships.
My husband and I spend a lot of time at raves, listening to really loud EDM. We also like to go to the gym together. And we love theme parks! That said, we can also have a ton of fun just driving around together or going to the grocery store. Fun is at the forefront of our partnership and we both really love it.
Rhodes says you should ask yourselves if you are "best friends that still have fun together." Being able to have fun in your relationship means you'll have a great time, no matter what you are doing together. Not only that, but fun will help ward off the stresses of life and keep the two of you connected.
If you and your partner can both answer "yes" to all of these questions, it likely means you are building your forever love. No two couples are the same, but by starting with a foundation of love and knowing that you are both in it for the long haul, you'll have a lot to look forward to in the future!