Like me, I know you answer the "Why are you still single?" question at least two to three times a week. As clever as I'm sure you are, you can never find enough witty responses to satisfy people's curiosity.
It never stops being annoying when family and friends take the liberty to ask you about your dating life (or lack thereof). They don't just ask; they either grill you about your choices or pity you.
The situation usually goes like this: "So, you haven't met anyone in the past year? Aw. You'll find someone when you least expect it. You're still a beautiful girl." It's gotten so bad, you've been thinking of hiring a publicist just to help you formulate the perfect response.
But, nothing hits harder than when you're sitting across from a handsome guy who has beautiful eyes and a great sense of humor, and he casually asks the question to end all questions. You're usually mid-laugh, or you have just finished eating a buffalo wing.
But, it never fails. He wants to know why you're still single, and you can't dodge the question. Whatever you do, don't answer with any of these responses:
1. "I just went through a party phase."
You shouldn't have to apologize for a point in your life when you weren't thinking about dating. Now that you've decided you want something serious, that's all that matters moving forward.
Sure, you can tell your closest friends that for a good while, you were having way too much fun partying. But, try telling that to a man who may be looking at you as someone he wants to settle down with.
Most people probably don't want to hear about your sexual past on a first date. So, do yourself a favor and zip your lips about all of your one-night stands that involved a little too much Grey Goose.
2. "Most men are jerks."
You met 30 guys in the past six months, and 90 percent of them were idiots. There were a few guys online whose idea of romance meant sending you their penis pics before you could even tell them what your favorite color was.
Do you remember the one guy who stared at you about five seconds too long after he told you (more than 10 times) how pretty you were? What about the two who offered to pay you for sex? Don't forget the headache you got from listening to that one guy talk about his five ex-girlfriends, failing music career and the reason he hates politicians.
Save these tales for your journal entries or your next performance at open mic night. Men already know how jerky the majority or their gender is.
3. "I wanted time to be selfish."
Men aren't the only ones who can be selfish, superficial and snooty. You've done it, too.
You didn't reply to the guy online who still loved comic books and video games. The last time you met a dude an inch or two shorter than you, you wanted to scream at him to grow. You didn't call that guy after you slept with him because he sucked in bed.
But the good thing is, you're self-aware. You've checked your bad behavior at the door. You're ready for a real relationship, and you've been learning from your mistakes. There's no need to dredge up the past.
No matter what anyone tells you, first impressions still matter. Trust me, if the guy sticks around long enough to get to know you, he'll hear more than enough dating war stories.
He may even feel lucky that your dating life kind of sucked because now you're ready to seriously settle down with someone. There's no need to give away too much in the beginning about a part of your life that could potentially make you appear bitter or even judgmental.
So, the next time a guy asks why you're still single, tell him about all the fun and cool stuff you've been doing while you've not been in a relationship. How many other women has he met who dreamed of skydiving and actually did it?