Men are interesting creatures. They can be so adorable and sweet, you don’t even know what to do with them.
They can be thoughtful and caring in ways that make you fall so hard, you’re not sure which way is up. Quite simply, it’s in the female nature to love men.
Men and women are clearly very different, however; ladies often want things from men they aren't willing to give in return.
This is frustrating, since we’re the ones having sex with them, right? Like the saying goes, “A good man is hard to find.” Preach.
Real talk: Men drive women crazy most of the time — and not in the “You Drive Me Crazy” sense that Queen Brit has been telling us for years. I mean you drive me crazy in the “why are you the way you are?” and “why do you think that’s okay?” kind of way.
So many guys do things women not only hate but also don't understand. Between dad jeans and weirdly misogynistic attitudes, there are certain things that make us girls want to run away and never come back.
Here are 13 things men do that make ladies secretly hate them:
1. “Just the tip”
We’ve all been there: You’re getting all hot and heavy with a cute guy, but you’re not ready to “go all the way.” So, he pleads with you, “Come on, just the tip!”
Excuse me, sir? Just the tip? No! If your business makes contact with my business, — if there is penetration at all — that is sex. And, please stop making us feel like uptight assh*les from not allowing this to happen.
2. Texting to say “What’s up?” and then not responding for three hours
Why did you start a conversation with me if you don't plan to text me back? If you don’t have time to talk, don’t bother texting me. If you do this, I'll assume you're playing some kind of game because overthinking is what women do.
Just be respectful and mindful that we deserve responses, especially if you’re the one who initiated the correspondence in the first place.
3. Not changing their sheets regularly
What is it with guys not changing their sheets regularly and also thinking it’s okay to re-wear socks? (See also: overdoing it with the cologne.) You smell like a Russian bathhouse, dude. Take a shower.
4. Leaving the toilet seat up
Ah, this one is classic. We unknowingly go to the bathroom in the middle of the night, and when we sit, we fall right into the toilet.
What is so difficult about putting down the godforsaken toilet seat? This is something on which men and women will simply never see eye to eye.
5. Getting offended when we can’t hang out but labeling us as "clingy" when we do the same thing
This is such a double standard. Why is it that when a girl has plans with her friends, it’s not okay with the guy, but if he has plans with the boys, it’s totally okay? It’s unfair that we have to play these games and, somehow, be available but not too available.
6. Getting mad because we have our periods
It’s not our fault we have to deal with this monthly curse. How would you like to be the one who is bleeding for five days, trying to reign superior over horrible cramps and an overwhelming desire to stuff your face with chocolate?
We want to have sex, too. It’s not like we asked for this to happen because we have some secret wish to ruin your life. Trust us, it’s ruining our lives, too.
7. Touching our phones
This one is easy: DO NOT TOUCH MY PHONE!
8. Trying creative sex too early in the game
We all have our fetishes. But, nothing makes us go ice cold faster than you asking to do something out of the ordinary before everyone's comfortable. Save your penchant for leather for another time.
9. Getting mad when we steal their clothes
Your undershirts are really comfy, okay? If we borrow a t-shirt, you should probably just assume you won't be getting it back. And, don’t get mad at us about it because it makes you look like a dick. It’s an undershirt. Get over it. (We also look super cute in it -- don’t even try to deny it.)
10. Tipping poorly
Ladies appreciate being wined and dined. Going out on dates makes us feel special, and it’s sweet when you ask us to dinner and make the effort to wear a button-up instead of your Bears jersey.
That being said, there is nothing less attractive than a bad tipper. It makes us uncomfortable, and you better believe it’s going to piss off our server. Frankly, it makes you look cheap.
If you don’t have the money to leave a decent tip, you clearly don’t have the money to be eating at a restaurant. If you don't have the means to pay the tip, plan a romantic home-cooked meal.
11. Asking to have a threesome with our hot friend, whom we would rather die than see naked
It just isn't going to happen. Life is not a porno. Just because I watched porn with you that one time doesn’t mean we’re recruiting one of my girlfriends to join us for a romp. Mmk?
12. Some bizarre aversion to belts
What is it with dudes not wanting anything to do with belts? Guys seem to think it's attractive to let your (dad) jeans hang down your butt, where you constantly have to pull them up. That is not cute. Just get yourself a nice belt and call it day.
13. Acting like we’re going to be serious...
...Only to be back on Tinder three days later. Just say what you want. If you want to see other girls, fine; just let us know. We don’t want to sit around, thinking this will be something when it quite obviously won't.
We might be overly emotional sometimes, but we’re just as capable of thinking rationally about a situation as you are. Don’t underestimate the power of a fierce woman.