The day after was excruciating.
A promising relationship ended without warning, leaving you smashed and defeated.
Lying there in bed, unable to sleep, you just played the ending scene over and over in your head, and you kept coming back to the same questions: "What did I do wrong?" "Why didn't I see it coming?" "If I had seen it coming, could I have done something different?"
You can't stand the advice from friends and family, most of which is so horribly cliched, you can only cringe in reply. The "more fish in the see" argument should be freakin' outlawed, and all that sympathy and pity just makes everything worse.
To top it all off, it's summer. Everyone is outside doing fun things, exploring and adventuring and enjoying life.
Well, take that as a cue. Life isn't over, and in fact, a summer fling could be just what you need.
6. Sitting around all day will only drain you more, and the sun is shining.
Coping with a breakup — or trying to overcome any type of funk — isn't easy, and you only make it worse by lazing around the house. Yeah, it will take some effort to get out there, but you'll soon find your energy returning, along with some self-confidence and general cheer.
Before you know it, you might be walking up to a stranger and striking up a conversation. Meeting new people is a huge energy high.
5. You have a ton of casual dating options.
When the weather cooperates, summer is the perfect time of year for simple dating ideas. You can do just about anything outside, from hiking and camping to beaches and amusement parks.
The best part is, most of these activities don't have profoundly serious or romantic overtones. Nah, you're just out and about with someone who happens to like swimming, bicycling and skee ball.
4. The more you mope, the more bitterness leaves its mark.
The more you mope and pout and curse the world, the more bitterness takes hold. You might think it's only temporary, and that it'll disappear as you begin to leave the failed relationship behind.
But, that's not always true. Glimpses of that bitterness stick with us, and unfortunately, the observant can spot it without too much trouble.
And there isn't a bigger turnoff or red flag in the world of dating than excessive bitterness.
3. The weather can be a huge help, and experiencing it with another is wonderful.
Consider the silver lining. It's summer, and the weather is beckoning, calling for you to emerge from your dungeon of despair.
People can — and do — suffer from legitimate weather-related afflictions, both mental and physical, so poor weather makes any depression even worse.
Good weather, on the other hand, can be fantastic for your mood. It also gives you incentive to enjoy it with another person, which is really the optimal arrangement.
2. Summer is tailor-made for casual flings.
You might be surprised by just how many singles are up for a summer fling. There's just something about this season. Maybe it's the impermanence of the weather, or perhaps it has something to do with the carefree nature of the days.
Whatever it is, there's a reason most people never refer to a "winter fling." No, the weather is warm, people are wearing fewer clothes and fun is the name of the game.
1. Combat serious loss with lighthearted dating (and a little sex).
It's generally not a great idea to pursue another long-term serious relationship after one just ended. "Rebound" is a common term, and though it has negative implications, it can also be extremely useful for your state of mind and self-esteem.
Summer is perfect for a simple fling; the person you're with doesn't have to be marriage material. He or she just has to enjoy your company, and yeah, it would help a lot if you shared a similar summer fling goal.
Toss in some sex to help boost that flagging self-esteem, and suddenly, everything starts to look a lot brighter.
It's just wrong to feel this way during summer, right? So, do something about it.