13 Things 'Single You' Promised 'Relationship You' Wouldn't Fall For
Regardless if you’ve been in a relationship for five months or five years, you’re freshly aware of all the concessions your single self wouldn’t have let fly.
You told yourself you wouldn’t become one of those girls with a boyfriend who neglects all other responsibilities, only when it comes to him.
But damn, is being in love sometimes really worth it.
Remember, it’s always easier to place judgments and terms on that which we are unfamiliar.
Here are all the things “Single You” promised “Relationship You” would never fall for.
1. Shacking up and playing “house” all weekend
You used to hate that one friend who couldn’t come across town to hang because she was having too much fun cooking and cuddling with her boyfriend.
Now you ARE her, and you get it. The attention is fun. The sexual chemistry is fulfilling. And what can you say? The option to not leave your couch sounds better.
2. Referring to your partner in every story
It’s like you don’t live separate lives anymore. This used to scare Single You and made you say harsh things like, “She’s not her own person.”
But now, it makes you feel good to have each other’s backs and say things like, “I get to hang out with my best friend.”
3. Spending all day in bed watching movies you hate for him
Sh*t, is this love? Ugh, Single You would hate that too.
You were vocally adamant on your refusal to see “Horrible Bosses 2,” and yet, there you are, eating your words along with the bag of popcorn while Single You dies a little.
4. Giving up plans with your friends to attend his niece’s fourth birthday
Don’t worry, single self, Relationship You hates you for this one too.
While you could have been eating and gossiping with your girlfriends, you are instead doing it with toddlers, trying to impart feminist ideals on Disney princesses (at least there’s guaranteed pizza?).
5. Talking about wedding stuff
Three years ago, you couldn’t even bring yourself to watch “27 Dresses,” and now you’re considering using Pinterest to plan your wedding.
Even if you’re not thinking about marriage seriously, you have thought about what hitched life would be like with your current beau...
6. Referring to yourselves as a "we"
This one always made Single You especially bitter – girls who are “part of a couple” and thus, need to refer to her and her “other half” as a “We.”
And yet, here you are, answering people’s questions about your weekend plans almost instinctively as “Us.”
7. Staying in because your boyfriend isn’t going out
This one takes guts to admit, so at least you’re not totally betraying your moral high ground.
Single You knew how to spot one when she saw the “I’m not feeling well” excuses coming on.
You’re not trying to get all dolled up for no one’s attention. There, you said it. You can go back to rubbing your boy toy’s back now.
8. Choosing to meet his parents instead of calling back your own
You already know yours; why not get to know his a little better, er, right?
It’s nice to know even head-in-the-clouds Relationship You has boundaries.
9. Posting more than a few vacation “wefies”
Vacation pics are already upsetting to everyone who isn’t there.
Why make it worse by showcasing lovey-dovey, vomit-inducing pictures of you and your boy making out? Single You would have called you out two Snapchat stories ago.
10. Becoming too comfortable
In trying to still be true to Single You, Relationship You has kept up burping at the table with pleasure, and now it’s gotten too out of hand.
Not only have you grossed out Single You, but you’ve managed to somehow gross out Relationship You as well.
Perhaps it was the time you peed in the shower while he was in it with you that really set things over the edge. Regardless, no one is happy about this.
11. Falling for grand gestures
The bullsh*t that used to make you go, “Naww” now makes you go, “Awww.” Where did your gag reflex go?
Single You would not be impressed by a bouquet of flowers (right, she would be really jealous of the girl who got them).
12. Bringing boyfriend drama around
No one wants to hear about the latest soap opera that is your relationship, let alone make you feel better about having a boyfriend when he or she is single.
Relationship You should know her audience better. And yet, it’s more entertaining than a “Dawson’s Creek” love triangle.
13. Trading watching “Real Housewives” for considering being a real housewife
You never thought the day would come when you break up with your favorite reality television show because you don’t have the time to watch it.
Instead, you’ve swapped it for contemplating your own reality. And you have to admit, it is kind of nice to take an actual lunch break and still have time to get your nails done…
Single You wants to stage an intervention.