This Video Breaks Down Why Being Single Will Always Be A Healthy Thing
Ever since I can remember, people were trying to pair me up with someone.
In kindergarten, my teacher made a joke that my friend and I were going to get married simply because we were of opposite sexes.
I was embarrassed, but mostly angry. I didn't want a husband or a boyfriend, I just wanted to make innovative crafts, sit pretzel-style in a circle with my friends and talk at my cat Peter.
When puberty hit, the pressure to find a boyfriend amplified.
There was pressure from all sides. My family, friends and friends' parents were more concerned about if (and who) I was dating than they were with my personal interests and pursuits.
This pressure continues to increase as I get older, especially as a woman.
I have mostly been single throughout my 26 years, with a couple serious boyfriends here and there because I enjoy it.
I'm very comfortable as a single person, and yet, whenever I'm single, I feel a yanking on my arm telling me I should be worried. I say to myself that I shouldn't waste my “good years” and should find a mate before the “good ones” are taken.
So when you throw my own insecurities into the mix, the pressure really is coming in from all sides.
And the pressure from society to put an end to my single life is also ever-present.
A male acquaintance once told me it was OK to be a single woman, but only until I was 27. Any woman who was single at 27 or older, according to him, must not have been wanted by anyone else.
When I pressed him about where he came to this conclusion he pulled out of nowhere, he could give no explanation. Notably, he was 30 and single.
The stigma of being single — of being sad and alone — is unfairly and predominantly applied to women.
A Google image search for “single” brings up images of sad women, many of which are surrounded by cats. But the only thing that makes me sad are those search results.
Single women are seen as cat ladies, and single men are seen as bachelors.
However, while it's true that women get most of the public shame for being single, men also feel this pressure.
A study published in Psychological Science found that men worry that being single or breaking up with an SO will hurt their social status.
The study also concluded that men tend to base their self-esteem off their relationship statuses more than women do. Surprising, I know.
The study said,
Yes, you read that right. The findings actually revealed that single people may actually be healthier than those in committed relationships.
To see scientific findings that go against how society views a lone rider is extremely validating. I wanted to learn more.
Watch the video above to find out just how great being single can be.