Relationships

It's Not The End Of The World: Tips For Navigating A Terrible Breakup

by Alexander Wang

You and your boyfriend or girlfriend just broke up. Maybe you thought you were going to spend your whole life with this person, and now you feel totally weak. Maybe you saw it coming, or maybe you didn’t — regardless, your new, single life will bring about adjustments. The biggest change will likely be your new abundance of free time.

If you used to spend a large proportion of your free time with your ex, you may have no idea what to do with yourself now. It’s your choice: You can spend this new free time grieving about your lost love, daydreaming about fantasies in which you two magically get back together — or you can try some tips listed below.

1. Make your bed

One of the hardest things to do after a bad breakup is to leave your bed. A bad breakup can pull you into an engulfing depression, the kind in which sleep feels like the only escape. Making your bed is the first step toward recovery because it forces you to get up — to live. It’s a symbol of you picking your life up and putting it back in order. Consider your friends who have their sh*t together; I bet they make their beds. And once you do the same, it’s that much more difficult to flop back down.

2. Pick up a hobby

It’s true that a good way to work on getting over someone is to distract yourself. So pick up a hobby! Learn to play an instrument or a new language; acquiring new skills takes commitment and commitment is sexy. Try dancing or become awesome at a tough video game. Later, when you meet a new special someone, you’ll be an even better you.

3. Work out

Far too many of us fall victim to the pitfalls of that dreaded (yet totally real) relationship weight gain. For someone who’s newly single, nothing is likely to make you feel more awesome than a solid workout. Exercise releases endorphins, which make you feel happy. In addition to keeping you busy, your new, chiseled bod certainly won’t hurt your confidence.

4. Read

Reading is such a great tool for distraction and it’s also educational. While reading can absolutely make you smarter, a solid novel will also leave you totally satisfied. Plus, when you really engross yourself in a book, it’s impossible to think about anyone or anything else, much less your ex.

5. Hang out with friends

Assuming you weren’t awful to your friends while you were in a relationship, they will be around to comfort you through the tough time. They will not judge (at least true friends won’t), they’ll both distract you and help you move forward.

6. Find a rebound

Just be aware of yourself and your state of mind when making this decision. Don’t prowl around for a quick lay if you’re still an emotional wreck. In fact, only consider rebounding if you have a clear enough head to know to steer away from potentially disastrous decisions — you don’t want to wake up next to a one-night stand feeling even crummier about yourself.