Every person who regularly hooks up with men in this day and age has come across one of those guys who "can't get hard with a condom on." Or maybe he just "hates condoms."
Whatever the case, he's being a little bitch about using a condom, and you're stuck deciding whether or not you want to get laid tonight and risk getting an STD, or sacrifice getting laid to avoid the possible STD.
Yesterday, something wonderful happened for me and for humanity as a whole: I got to interview my favorite rapper of all time (and the new face of Trojan condoms), Lil Dicky, about all things safe sex related. And as far as the whole not-using-a-condom-with-a-random-hookup thing goes, he doesn't get it.
"I don't ever understand how people can be so laid back about this type of stuff," he says. "If you're a logical being everywhere else in life, why would you abandon your logic in the bedroom?"
As part of Lil D's new campaign for Trojan, he's launched a "Pillow Talk" video series. In every short episode, Lil Dicky chats with a new person on his bed about safe sex, and he urges them to use Trojan condoms. (He is the face of the brand, after all.)
Scroll below to read his answers to any and all of our most pressing questions, along with more episodes from the new series.
On when you can ditch the condoms in a relationship...
It's hard to put a specific number on it. It's more about the status of the relationship. It's about exclusivity. That's where I'd feel comfortable. I would never have sex without a condom unless we were not seeing other people. Also, we'd have to get tested. The two things are exclusivity and getting tested. We have to make sure our past isn't lingering with anybody.
On couples who still use condoms after establishing exclusivity...
Everybody's different and it just depends. I've never had sex without a condom with a girl who's not on birth control. It always varies by couple, and it's hard for me to criticize overly cautious people because I'm overly cautious.
On guys who say they can't get hard with a condom on...
It's definitely a thing. I've heard it be said; I just can't relate. When I even hold a girl's hand, I get a boner. I never ever could imagine not getting hard. For me, if I'm sitting with a naked girl who I want to have sex with, you could do a lot of things to me and I'd still have a boner. Putting on a condom is certainly not gonna prevent me from having a boner.
On what girls should do if they're hooking up with guys who say they can't get hard without a condom...
That sucks. Never would I say you should be like, "Oh OK, that's fine." I would never cave. You don't want to make him feel bad. But a part of me thinks that sometimes guy say that because they'd just rather have sex without a condom. Every dick is different, but I really don't think the condom itself is making the difference from boner to not boner. If I'm about to have sex, I have a boner. There's no doubt about it. If I put a condom on my dick, I still have that boner. I'm sitting with a girl and I'm touching her breasts. If I'm a girl, I'm not buying that as an excuse. Never am I catering to him by not using a condom. You should put it on the guy to figure out his shit if he wants to have sex. It's not on you to cater to him.
On stealthing (aka when a dude secretly slips off his condom mid-sex)...
Oh my God. That should be a crime. I think it's sexual assault. If not assault, it's definitely just inappropriate. You don't have consent to do that. You need consent to have sex but you also need consent to do that type of thing.
Couldn't have said it better myself.