If You Want Her Heart, Make Her Laugh
No matter who you ask, every woman will tell you the same thing: She wants a man who can make her laugh. It’s a universal fact for all those who enjoy laughing – which, as far as I know, is everybody. Is that all a woman is looking for? No. But her finding you funny increases your chances with her three-fold.
Laughing is a universal language on its own. Some people speak the same language and others don’t. The thing about humor is that having a different sense of humor is basically a permanent thing. I’m guessing it is possible to find different things funny over time – as we clearly do with age – but changing your entire sense of humor once you are an adult isn’t likely, if at all possible. When a guy can make a woman laugh, she at least knows that they’re speaking the same language. That’s always a great place to start.
Sense of humor reveals a lot about a person – more than you’d expect. There are several different theories of humor, one being the incongruity theory. The incongruity theory basically states that we find things to be funny when the outcome doesn’t line up with our expectations. When a joke or story begins, or any real-life scenario, our minds automatically try to play out how the remainder is going to go; we anticipate what is going to come next.
The anticipation is logical thought combined with our emotions, all resulting from our past experiences and thoughts; we guess what is coming next by comparing what is happening now to what has happened to us before. When we get an unexpected outcome, our minds suddenly experience a new set of thoughts and emotions that no longer line up with those that were a result of our anticipation. This sudden switch in thought and emotions, according to the incongruity theory, is what we interpret as funny.
This tells us two things. One, in order for something to be deemed funny, it has to be unexpected. Two, when you know what people do and don’t find funny, you get a clearer understanding of what they find to be ordinary and what they find to be extraordinary. Extraordinary is funny. Ordinary is boring and expected.
You get a glimpse into their thought processes, into the way their minds work, and a slight glimpse into their pasts. Of course, a lot of things can be unexpected and not deemed to be funny, but chances are, they are deemed to be funny by someone. This is why some people have a very light and almost childlike sense of humor, while others can have a dark, even gruesome sense of humor.
The darker the sense of humor, the darker the person. Getting to know a person’s sense of humor gives you a good read on his or her character. Of course, reading that character isn’t always easy, as many individuals do their best to hide their true natures. But that comes with practice.
Nevertheless, if a woman finds a man funny, she believes they have a similar sense of humor and therefore must have a bit in common. They are more likely to have things they can relate on -- similar experiences, similar beliefs and ways of seeing the world. When a woman finds a man funny, she feels closer to him because she senses that they can understand each other in a way not everyone can.
On top of this, laughing makes you feel really good; it’s a great aphrodisiac. Laughing makes you feel alive and happy. Who doesn’t want to feel that way as often as possible?
Making a woman laugh is literally making her happy. Have you ever seen a sad laughing person? Only if he or she is wearing one of those creepy clown costumes. Otherwise, it’s basically impossible. If she’s laughing, she’s happy and having a good time. If she’s happy thanks to you, then she’ll like you for it. It’s really not rocket science. If you can’t make her laugh, then she’s probably not going to want to spend time with you.
She’ll certainly not want to spend her life with you; a life without laughter isn’t much of a life at all. Laughing is fun and you have to have fun in a relationship to make it work. If fun is difficult to achieve then you really may not be a good fit for each other -- unless you aren’t thinking long-term, rather, just for the night. Then just figure out what she finds funny and feed it to her.
In all seriousness, making a woman laugh is really the only way into her heart. You don’t have to make her hysterical. You don’t need to have her dying of laughter.
But if you can’t get constant smiles and giggles, you’re not doing it right. When you can get a woman to anticipate the laughter, anticipate the fun and enjoyment of interacting with you, you’ll see her face light up the moment she sees you. When you get this, you’ve got her. If you light up the same way she does because she makes you laugh and smile all the time, then the two of you may very well be on your way to falling in love. But it all starts with laughter.
Photo via We Heart It