The way I see it, fidget spinners are to 2017 what Pokémon Go was to 2016.
They're both weird products made for children that have SUDDENLY taken the adult world by storm.
Last Summer, I remember people physically running into me on the streets while they tried to catch their Jigglypuffs and Pikachus.
Similarly, last night, a fully grown man stopped me on the street in a total panic to ask me if I knew where he could get a fidget spinner in the area.
It was only a matter of time before fidget spinners managed to make their way into the world of porn, like Pokémon Go did back in July 2016.
Apparently, new data from Pornhub shows a giant spike in users searching for "fidget spinner-oriented porn."
How popular is fidget spinner porn?
The spike for "fidget spinner" searches on Pornhub started to happen overnight on May 10. And if you're wondering exactly what I mean by a "spike," let me talk some numbers to you.
Searches for "fidget spinner" porn were up by almost 300 percent (282 percent to be exact), meaning, between May 10 and May 22, there were over 2.5 million searches for this term.
That's literally 2.5 MILLION people trying to jerk it to fidget spinner porn.
And if you're thinking to yourself, "Well, I don't know how many people are jerking off to other things, so how do I even know if 2.5 million people is that many for Pornhub?!"
Trust me, it's a huge amount.
"Fidget spinner" made the site's top 10 overall searches for the month as the fifth most popular search.
Who's searching for it?
So just who exactly comprises these 2.5 million kinky people searching for fidget spinner porn? Pornhub's data shows that they're mostly young and mostly women.
On the younger front, their data found that the searches were 186 percent more popular for younger users ages 18-24. The older people got, the less likely they were to search for it.
So don't worry; odds are, your mom isn't getting freaky to fidget spinner porn.
That being said, ladies were 19 percent more likely than their male counterparts to be searching for the unique porn genre.
What are people even getting when they search for "fidget spinner porn"?
I'm sure many of us are wondering what exactly "fidget spinner porn" would even look like.
Refinery29 reported that, although there are definitely some more ~risque~, NSFW options, a large majority of the results are just videos of fidget spinners spinning.
...whatever floats your boat, I guess.