What Does A Sex Dream With A Married Man Mean?

Kylah Benes-Trapp

A while ago, I collaborated with famed dream expert, Lauri Loewenberg, to decode any and all of your freakiest sex dreams. And I've had a guilty conscience about it ever since.

I know there are far freakier sex dreams than the 22 general concepts that are mentioned on that list. We all have deeply personal, weirdly detailed dreams that we sometimes just can't seem to shake out of our heads. 

Like, WHY did you dream about that guy from the grocery store yesterday? WHY was he wearing a top hat and nothing else?! What does it mean? Do you have to tell your boyfriend? Are you actually into the weird grocery store guy?!

So, I've decided to start a column. You guys can submit your sex dreams here, and we will have Lauri interpret one dream a week. 

This week, we have 21-year-old Abbey who recently had a dream about her married boss:

The dream started in a modern-looking house, neat, tidy, little clutter, everything was white. A much older man who felt like my boss came into the house. Grey hair, suit and tux, fairly fit, wedding band on his finger. We began making out, kissing, the whole thing was very heated. Then we began having sex, me on top, him on top. Nothing crazy, but it was all very passionate. Next thing I know, I'm watching him walk out the door and down the street. This dream has happened a few times, so I'm not sure what to think of it.

And here's what Lauri had to say about it:

As juicy as this dream is, let's start with the fact that the color white stood out to you. When a color stands out in a dream — or when anything at all stands out, for that matter — it's important and has significance to your life. White is typically the color of starting over, new beginnings, wiping the slate clean... something as pure as the un-driven snow. So what's new and/or refreshed in your life lately? The older, boss-like man is a clue. He's not some actual married man out there you are destined to get into an adulterous affair with, but rather, he's some part of you. Unknown men in women's dreams often represent her assertive side — the part of her that "has balls" and handles her shit... like a boss! Perhaps that's what's new with you lately. Have you been more dominate or authoritative in your life or in a particular situation? The sex is an important part of the dream, and actually means that you're being successful in incorporating those qualities into yourself just as you took him into your body. But why a married man? Well, don't worry. It doesn't mean you have the tendencies of a homewrecker. It may be more about a commitment you are wanting to make. Just as you weren't the one the man in your dream was married to, the commitment may be something you aren't entirely comfortable with or feels unnatural to you. OR, it's an idea you "messed around with," but decided wasn't for you. The man leaves at the end of the dream, which is pretty much confirmation from your subconscious that, yeah, this waking life issue was fun while it lasted and took balls to do it, but now it's time to move on.
White is typically the color of starting over, new beginnings, wiping the slate clean.

I hope this was helpful to Abbey and anyone else who might have had a dream about sex with a married man!

Again, if you have your own sex dream you'd like to have Lauri interpret, feel free to submit it here.