Your Post-Grad Dating Expectations Vs. The Sad Reality


Finally! You have entered the real, post-grad world: a place where you think everything will miraculously change for the better. No more frat guys or immature college girls. You’re going to meet someone of real value that you can get to know on a deeper level. You aren’t spending your weekends getting blacked out (false) so you think now is finally the time to meet that meaningful person (wrong).

A month passes by and you make excuses to yourself: I’m still getting acclimated and people are trying to redefine themselves and their partying habits. Well as the fifth month passes, you can’t help to think to yourself: WTF is going on? Where are all these "mature" people I was guaranteed to meet when I graduated?

I’m finally single after wasting my time with my college "sweetheart," where are all the prospects? By this time you probably realized that this perfect picture you created in your head is just that -- a picture in your head. There is no guarantee you will meet someone immediately or even after a year in the real world. Sure there are way more options out there, but how do you even meet these people? Where are they hiding? Seriously. Tell me where because I sure as hell can’t find them.

It’s not really surprising to expect more out of the post-grad dating world, I mean we all do because honestly it’s not like it could get any worse -- or could it? Let’s compare our expectations with the reality of dating:

Expectation: You go out to a fancy, expensive dinner

Reality: Everyone is poor and can’t afford expensive dinner

Expectation: The first date will always go well

Reality: You divulge too much about your ex and can’t shut up

Expectation: The guy will foot the bill

Reality: You’re both poor and he asks you to split it, leave the tip or get the after-dinner drinks

Expectation: You’re mature now, so he won’t try and sleep with you on the first date

Reality: That’s wishful thinking as you slowly gather your underwear and dignity off his bedroom floor

Expectation: You’ll have a couple of drinks to loosen up

Reality: You’re hammered by round 4

Expectation: You order a salad so not to be an ugly eater

Reality: There’s spinach in your teeth and balsamic dripping down your face

Expectation: You go on a blind date to prevent social circle overlap

Reality: The person you’re out with is your brother’s girlfriend’s best friend’s ex

Expectation: Tinder, Hinge and JDate will help you find the one

Reality: They will only help you get laid

Expectation: He’ll be 29, cool and experienced

Reality: His breath smells, he’s wearing a blazer over a t-shirt and he’s waiting for you to make the move

Expectation: When you picture your future

Reality: Your only soul mates are animals

Top photo credit: Tumblr