All The Times Being A Sensitive Guy Actually Saved My Relationship
I guess you could say I’m a sensitive guy -- and not the "don’t hurt my feelings" kind of sensitive, but the "by looking and being with you, I can tell what you need" kind.
Thank goodness that I am. If I weren’t, my relationships would have ended a lot faster than they did.
If a relationship is meant to end, it’s meant to end. But even if we do have a good chance of making things work, we sometimes fail to do this.
Why, you ask? Because you're usually too busy being sensitive to your own wants, needs, moods, and emotions to be aware of your partner's.
Being a sensitive man -- or woman, for that matter -- isn’t about bawling your eyes out whenever you watch the beginning of Bambi. It’s about paying close attention to your partner and understanding body language and facial signals.
It’s about knowing your partner incredibly well. But it's also about understanding that being changing, growing individuals means you will never completely know each other.
Being sensitive to your lover is wanting to get to know him or her over and over again. You want to do this without asking a million questions.
If you’re right for each other, you'll know what the other is thinking and feeling without needing explanation.
Here are the times when showing a little understanding saved my relationship.
If I weren’t sensitive, there wouldn’t have been a relationship to begin with.
There's a misconception of women wanting a "bad" boy. The truth is that most women want a man who can take charge from time to time.
However, they also want a sensitive guy. Even women who couldn’t imagine themselves with someone sensitive will realize that dating an asshole leads to a bad breakup.
Yes, you have the women who are a bit more mature and experienced. They aren’t looking for a badass; they know that badasses usually turn into jackasses.
They might want a strong, determined and partly-aggressive man, but they also want someone who is sensitive enough to treat them the way they want to be treated -- with respect and love.
I've always had a thing for mature women. I discovered that if I'd been any less sensitive to their needs, they wouldn't have given me the time of day.
Women have a way of sensing a guy's sensitivity almost by simply looking at him. If you’re just the right combination of rough and sensitive, finding the right woman will be much easier.
I realized she was hurting even when she didn't say it.
I’m sorry, guys, but women don’t always speak their minds. I think it’s even fair to argue that they are much less likely than men to tell their partners exactly how they're feeling.
While men are usually not the best communicators in a relationship, most don’t like to hide how they're feeling.
Women, on the other hand -- at least in my experience -- will hide their emotions. They want their men to figure it out on their own.
They want to see how sensitive you are to their moods and emotions. They want to see if you’re paying close enough attention -- if you care about them and/or love them.
I know it seems like a bit of a sneaky way to go about things. But the truth is that if a man cares about you enough, he will be sensitive to you. He will want to make and keep you happy, and he will likely keep an eye on how he thinks you're feeling.
I could have picked fights and chose not to.
You need to learn to pick your battles. Remember, this is a relationship that we’re talking about; battles should be left for career issues and what-have-you. Avoiding fights in a relationship is key.
When something is bothering you -- as it certainly will from time to time -- make sure that you have your priorities straight, and don’t start an unnecessary war.
Couples fight. It’s normal. It’s also normal for couples to fight over matters that are entirely trivial. And that’s why it’s normal for couples to break up.
The fights aren’t necessary, but you decide to fight them anyway. You let your ego get the best of you in fights, and you risk losing the person that you very well may one day realize was "the one."
People sometimes get into funks. They have bad moods. They aren’t always the best at keeping you off the path of wrath. Sometimes we get caught in the crossfire and instead of being understanding and sensitive, we decide to fire back.
Keeping my cool and swallowing my pride saved my relationships countless times. If your partner is being rude or disrespectful, wait until you both have cooled off a bit.
Tell your person that that behavior isn't acceptable. That’s how adults confront those they love.
I made her happy in the way she wanted me to -- without her having to say a word.
Sensitivity isn’t just about knowing when to be extra delicate or careful with the one you love.
It’s also about being sensitive to those little things that make life more pleasant -- those things that make your partner smile and laugh.
You shouldn’t feel like you’re constantly tiptoeing around the one you care for most. But you should be attentive to the little hints she will drop here and there.
These could be hints for what she wants to do on your next date or what she wants as a birthday or holiday present.
She might be hinting at how much attention she wants: how she wants you to hold her, how she wants to be treated.
Be sensitive to your partner's idea of how he or she wants to be treated. I know that you have your own definition of love, but that’s why love is so tricky.
Of course, what love means to you is important. But when you’re in a loving relationship, what matters more is how your lover wants to be loved.
Your approach to love and care isn't always what your partner wants. Everyone is a little different.
You’re going to have to become a good listener and observer if you want the relationship to last. You’re going to have to be a little sensitive.