7 Ridiculous Sex Myths We All Still Believe

By
Ad failed to load

For a relatively well-educated society, there are many people out there who believe dumb stuff.

And when it comes to sex, we're the worst. Think about all the stupid stuff you believed when you were a kid. I thought swallowing sperm could make you pregnant, and I definitely thought you couldn't get pregnant your first time until I was in high school. SMFH.

Yet our collective sexual health IQ is so low that many people wind up believing these kinds of myths well into adulthood. I listen to so many people spew nonsense out of their asses that my standard response is to simply stare in open disbelief as I ponder how someone could actually think this foolishness is fact.

Ad failed to load

Anyway, here are seven stupid sex myths people still believe.

1. A girl can't get pregnant on top because of #gravity.

I can't remember if I first heard this one from my little brother or that movie, "Knocked Up," but if boy-creatures out there actually tell each other this, then that is no bueno.

Ad failed to load

Fun fact, guys: Sperm are ALIVE, and they can SWIM. It doesn't matter which way you shoot because your little guys are gonna find home base (translation: the uterus) regardless of the direction.

2. The female orgasm is not real.

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL. Oh, hey! Sorry, just laughing my ass off for a hot second.

Ad failed to load

I can't believe that it’s 2016 and people think this is true. But alas, they do. I talk with guys all the time who openly question whether women really can get off. (They then collectively pat each other on the backs, whispering, “No, they can’t even have orgasms. It’s not your fault, bro.”)

Though mind-blowing, this sort of ignorance is sadly prevalent today. Ladies, if you're not having orgasms it's because you're sleeping with the wrong people. Thassit.

3. You can't get STDs from giving head.

I once hooked up with a guy who turned to me and said: “Oh no, babe, it’s okay to blow me without a condom. You can’t get STDs from head.”

Ad failed to load

And I just stared at him.

At first, I thought he was joking. But, to my horror, he was serious. So, if y’all are still out there giving blowjobs and cunnilingus without protection, then I have a message for you: It’s DANGEROUS.

4. Mansplaining: "I can't orgasm if I'm wearing a condom."

If a guy says this to you, my fellow females, do NOT believe it. Men absolutely CAN finish while wearing a condom. He's still going to give you the D regardless. I swear.

Ad failed to load

Are you really going to risk getting the clap (or something way worse) just so some guy can nut on his terms? Don't be that girl. Please, don't be that girl. Make him rubber up, or he can go home.

5. You can't get pregnant in water.

Again, sperm can swim no matter where they are shot, homie. See point #1.

Ad failed to load

6. If you masturbate, it will be harder to have an orgasm during sex.

Oh, the age-old tale of yesteryear that the nuns (or mom?) told us in Catholic school: If you touch your junk, Jimmy, it will ruin sex for you!

This is not true. If anything, masturbation will make your orgasms better.

Ad failed to load

You have to learn about your body to know what your body likes. Practice makes perfect, so don't be scared to jerk it.

 7. If a woman has too much sex she'll get looser.

This myth is an example of slut-shaming at its finest. The vagina is a muscle. It is meant to expand. Women can push an entire human out of that hole without doing permanent damage. You think some little pencil D is going to mess us up? NO.

Ad failed to load

Not everyone feels comfortable talking about sex. There are some questions that many of us are too timid to ask. But in Comedy Central's new show, Not Safe with Nikki Glaser, no sex or relationship topic is off limits! Catch new episodes Tuesdays at 10:30/9:30c on Comedy Central or anytime on the CC APP.

Ad failed to load

Must Reads

The Travel Accessory You Need This Summer, According To Your Zodiac Sign

Leaving behind your hometown and exploring the great beyond is one of the most important things you'll ever do in your lifetime. It breaks the monotony of your daily routine, pushes you out of your comfort zone, and forces you to appreciate a world c…
By Roya Backlund

6 Commitment-Free Ways To Change Up Your Look After A Breakup, If You Feel Like It

I'm married and not breaking up (I just had to clarify before I get a call from my husband wondering what's going on). However, if for some reason we ever did separate (again, not happening!), I've imagined I'd have this Eat, Pray, Love moment where …
By Stephanie Montes

Here's Everything That's Leaving Netflix In June

Summer is here, and with it comes plenty of opportunity to binge watch more movies and TV shows that we never knew we needed in our lives. May has passed by in a blink of an eye, so I definitely need to catch up on what Netflix is getting rid of afte…
By Kristen Perrone

Cherry Print Is One Of Summer's Biggest Fashion Trends & It's So Much Sweeter Than Florals

If there's one thing that I've had my eye on this summer it's a cool, flirty cherry-print dress. Along with versatile black tops and blue denim, the color red has become a staple in my wardrobe this year and anytime I can infuse it into my daily look…
By Ariana Marsh

13 Must-Have Experiences You Should Buy In Your 20s, Instead Of A New Couch

Life is one big experience. When you hit your 20s, though, you start getting pulled in the direction of your responsibilities. It isn't totally a bad thing, but you don't want to get so wrapped into adulting that you forget life's zest. Amazing exper…
By Jasmine Vaughn-Hall

I Tried Kim Kardashian's Weird Beauty Obsession & I Can't Stop Taking Selfies

You've been there before: You're scrolling through your Instagram feed when you see your favorite celeb post about their favorite new product — a face serum, vitamins that will make your skin brighter, or a specialty food service. You can't help but …
By Stephanie Montes

Where You Should Vacation This Summer, According To Your Zodiac Sign

Summer is so much more than just sweating in 90 degree weather and enjoying a long, lazy break from school (if you're lucky enough to still be in school). It's a time for making exciting new plans, falling madly and hopelessly in love, opening your m…
By Roya Backlund

Wander or Bust: The Amalfi Coast May Just Be The Most Beautiful Thing You'll Ever See

Wander or Bust is an Elite Daily travel series that follows young women all over the globe to record their journeys as they experience the thrill of the far-flung and unknown. They'll track their budgets, where they stay, where they eat and drink, a…
By Kaylin Pound

6 Brutally Honest Phases Of Life After A Breakup, Because You Will Survive 

If you've ever been through a bad breakup, you know that the struggle is real. For the weeks (or possibly months, if it was a really bad one) that follow, life can be rough, but there is always light at the end of the tunnel. Don't believe me? Just l…
By Rachel Shatto

Here's How You Can Find Out What Your Aura Color Is

Do you remember that movie Almost Famous? More specifically, the scene where William is trying to have a phone call with his mom, but a clairvoyant Band-Aid keeps shouting "Your aura is purple!" in his face? Well, that was the first time I had ever h…
By Roya Backlund

9 Women In Their 20s Reflect On The Advice They Wish They Had At Graduation

Graduating college can feel seriously scary. You've spent your entire life in school, working and preparing for the moment you enter the real world, but what happens when you get there? What if things don't go totally according to plan? You may have …
By Brittney Morgan

3 Early Signs You Are Going To Have Undeniable Chemistry With Your Crush

I don't know if there's anything better than the excitement of having a new crush — especially when that feeling's reciprocated. The butterflies that rush through your stomach as soon as they enter a room. The electricity that zips through your veins…
By Genevieve Wheeler

Emoji Pool Floats Are Here To Match Every Mood You’re In This Summer

Searching for the perfect poolside accessory to lounge around in this summer? This year’s hottest warm weather water trend isn’t a big floppy hat or designer sunglasses — it’s an emoji pool float. That’s right: Your favorite little digital expression…
By Rachel Murphy

Here's How Your Mood & Your Favorite Music Are Secretly Connected, According To Science

If you're someone who's likely to be found with ear buds in her ears at all times, you might not realize just how often you listen to music, or the ways in which it's really affecting you. From your morning commute to the tunes you blast while you co…
By Caroline Burke

This Is How Long It Takes For A Partner To Really Trust You, According To Experts

Trust is easily one of the most important parts of a healthy relationship, but typically, it's not something that's fully there from the start because it takes some time to build. How long it takes for a partner to trust you is a question that doesn'…
By Tayi Sanusi

7 Things You Forgot To Thank Your High School Friends For & Should ASAP

Friends are a dime a dozen, but a solid, genuine group of girlfriends can be difficult to come by. When you find your tribe, you need to stick with them until the end. For some lucky people, your high school friends have been your besties since day o…
By Rachel Chapman

These 3 Zodiac Signs Will Have The Best Week, So Bask In The Glory

It's officially the second week of May, and the warmth of spring has finally arrived. The birds are chirping, the sun is shining, and the bright weather is allowing everyone to finally break out their favorite pair of shorts. If you think the gorgeou…
By Roya Backlund

7 Men Reveal What Attracted Them To Their Last Crush & They'll Make You Swoon

He reminded me of Nate Archibald from Gossip Girl. That's legitimately what I found appealing about my most recent crush. Sorry, but it doesn't get any deeper than that. In other instances though, when I'm not trying to live out my lustful, adolescen…
By Sydnee Lyons

A Relationship Expert Reveals His Long-Distance Relationship Survival Guide

"Long-distance relationships are extremely relaxing and easy to navigate," said no one in a long-distance relationship ever. Whether you are bicoastal babes or a quick two-hour train ride apart, distance makes the heart grow fonder, but it also makes…
By Kimmy Foskett
)}