Relationships

Man Brackets: Finding The Right Man For You, Based Solely On Age

by Lauren Skirvin

There are many factual circumstances that can tell you a lot about a person before you get to know him or her. Hometown, profession, family of origin, zodiac sign, etc. Sometimes, these factors can tell you right off the bat whether or not you will be compatible with this person.

Through my highly clinical, investigative work of being single for almost six years, I have found that a man’s age is a significant factor in teaching you about the relationship you may have with him.

Since I’ve dated my neighbor, your brother and everyone in our class, I have noticed some patterns of different age brackets.

Obviously, there are exceptions and not every person matures at the same rate, but from my personal experience, there are many similarities across the board for the following age ranges:

Early 20s

I have a huge weakness for boys in their early 20s. They’re so full of life and eager to please. Their bodies are usually in tip-top shape and they just want to bang you all day and night.

But, beyond those superficial things, they are incredibly great boyfriends. They make a huge effort to win you over and take you on the most extravagant, creative dates. They haven’t turned cynical yet, so they will love you harder than anyone has or will.

However, most of them are more than willing to cheat on their girlfriends. It happened to me and to many of my friends, and I hate to say it, but when I was younger, I was a part of helping it happen to other girls.

Most early-20s guys probably aren’t planning to marry the girl they are with, but they think they are. I don’t know if the idea of it scares them or what, but they have a straying eye like nobody’s business. They just aren’t mature enough to handle monogamy yet.

Mid to Late 20s

These guys are your worst nightmare. They’ve been burned by the girls they thought were the loves of their lives and have probably turned their pain into pleasure by doing whatever the f*ck they want.

These are the boys who will have sex with you and not even spend the night. They just “want to have fun” and “hang with the boys,” but still come over late at night for the old in and out. We girls have all been there, too, and these guys are fun if you aren’t looking for anything serious.

But, beware of getting attached to these manipulation masters. They always know what to say to keep you coming back. They will whisper sweet nothings into your ear and make you feel like you are the most important girl in the world.

But, they are also doing this to a number of other women. Hey, whatever they need to do to get laid on the regular, right? They are constantly sending you mixed signals that will confuse the sh*t out of you if you try to decipher them.

Early 30s

These guys are awesome, in theory. They are on the brink of reaching their peaks in life. They are hitting their strides in their careers, coming into their looks, becoming financially stable and are almost at full maturation as men. They are like the sparkly diamonds in the sea of coal.

But, it’s very difficult to mine for diamonds. When my friends and I think about guys we’ve dated, not many of them fall into this age bracket. They’re elusive. They’re unicorns.

If they aren’t already in relationships, they know they are in a good place and don’t want to wreck it with the complications that relationships bring. They need to focus and buckle down before they can give themselves to someone else, so they are nowhere to be found on the dating market.

If you do manage to pin one of these guys down, you are usually constantly clawing for more attention. Be prepared to take a backseat to most other things in his life.

Mid 30s

The best men are aged 35 or 36. These guys are fully grown men and ready for something real and lasting. Seriously, no complaints here.

Late 30s

If you are an emotional girl, these guys will drive you to the insane asylum. They are in great places in their lives and they want, more than anything else, to share it with a special someone. They are the men who will finally treat you like a desirable woman, take you on nice dinner dates, call you and not make you question whether or not they are interested.

However, if you suddenly find yourself coming to the point of taking it to the next level, these guys will distance themselves. They are still making an effort and treating you well, but you have no idea how they feel about you on a deeper level or if they are ready for a bigger commitment.

Everything is on the surface. They try to communicate with you and placate your fears, but it’s not enough. They can’t say, “I love you,” ask you to move in or even ask you to be their girlfriend in a timely enough manner for you.

They say they want to take their time and be sure because they have been through many relationships that didn’t pan out. They can’t put their hearts on the line just yet. After six-to-eight months of this merry-go-round, an emotional girl will start to freak out from insecurity and end it out of fear.

Early 40s

I do not have a ton of experience with men in this age bracket, but the few I have dated are chill. They have learned not to take life too seriously and will go with the flow, no matter what happens. They are never too forceful or eager, but are completely up-front at all times regarding how they feel about you and what they want.

These guys definitely know how to take care of you. If you are too young to be dating men of this age, though, it becomes a daddy-issue thing. But, if you are mature enough to handle them, it will probably be the best relationship you’ve ever had.

Beware of their all-or-nothing attitude, though, if you aren’t at that same stage in your life. These guys don’t care to mess around, so if you aren’t ready for marriage and kids, I suggest dating in a lower age bracket.

Knowing where you are in life is your best mode of operation so you know which age bracket will likely suit you best. If you fall madly in love with someone who isn’t in the bracket you want, then, by all means, follow your heart! Hopefully, this guide will at least help you understand what you are getting yourself into.