Loose Lips Sink Ships: 4 Reasons To Value Privacy In A Relationship
Society practically sees Beyoncé and Jay Z as modern-day Adam and Eve.
The couple is definitely not as picture-perfect as they let on, but they do one thing right: keep their love life private.
The music moguls could have broken up five times and gotten back together, but we’ll never know. That’s how it’s supposed to be.
Here are some reasons and tips why sealing your lips could help seal your happy fate with a partner:
1. Loose lips sink ships: If you fight, you may temporarily resent your partner, but your friends will permanently despise him or her.
Letting other people in opens up a can of worms.
The less involved with the relationship people are, the less judgmental they will be of your partner.
Similarly, the more that people know about you two, the more they will feel entitled to dish out advice because they'll start to feel like members in the relationship.
When you are mad at your partner, you only tell your friends your side of the story and vent about the bad things about him or her. People go off of what you tell them, not what actually happened, so their opinions and advice are biased.
You could actually be the one at fault, but after a chat with your friends, you'll feel like your partner should be the one to come crawling back to you.
More importantly, you rarely talk about all of the good things he or she does for you, so he or she only sees your relationship in a negative light.
If you get back together after a big fight, friends could disapprove and influence your feelings and thoughts.
Friends sometimes think it becomes their duty to intervene if they think you're not with the right person.
Just look at how Lily repeatedly sabotaged Ted’s relationships in "How I Met Your Mother."
It’s admirable when friends try to look out for your best interests, but if they are not in the situation, they really don’t get a say in what happens.
Besides, most people just like drama; they don’t actually care what happens to you and your partner in the long run. You’re not the Kardashians; hell, the Kardashians are not even the Kardashians.
The only people who deserve front-row seats to your love life are you and your partner. Preserve your privacy.
Keeping matters between you two will open the floodgates of communication, strengthen bonds and allow you to feel more comfortable confiding in one another.
2. Keep family out of it.
Don’t meet parents until there’s a ring involved. There’s a reason why people don’t introduce partners to parents until they are engaged: mothers-in-law have a bad rep for a reason.
A prime example is Marie from "Everybody Loves Raymond," but fathers-in-law can be just as psychotic. If you are not 110 percent, don’t put yourself through the torture.
You already have a crazy family; don’t become a part of someone else’s until you absolutely have to. Also, like friends, family will have strong opinions about your partner.
A new couple isn’t yet fully equipped to deal with familial pressures, and quite frankly, it’s all unnecessary unless you two really do wind up tying the knot.
3. You may forgive, but your friends and family won’t always let you forget.
Relationships sometimes suffer, but they can also evolve and mature just like people.
A breakup is the wakeup call; certain people need to get their acts together and second-chances are not always failures.
Some couples need to blow each other to bits before they can rebuild together.
A relationship outsider is harder to convince of this, since he or she doesn’t possess the same open mind and love for the person that you do.
As a result, onlookers can stunt your growth in a relationship. You may be ready to progress with a partner, but it’s hard to move forward when those closest to you prevent you from letting go of the past.
Friends and family can pick at emotional scabs, pour salt into wounds and stick their fingers into bullet-holes as attempts to keep you away from a person because they think they know what’s going on.
Only you and that person truly know what’s happening, though.
You are the only one who has to live with your decisions, so if you want to make something work, then do it.
Don’t let others hinder your decision-making process because you will be the one living with regret, not them.
4. Keep it offline
Some things are better left unsaid and unposted.
There will always be bumps in the road, but highlighting such faults and mistakes online will not improve a situation or remedy any pain. In fact, doing so will only breed more problems.
More importantly, you wouldn’t lend an eye to your sex life, so you shouldn’t lend an ear into your fights.
Fights are just as intimate as sexual encounters, if not more, since personal matters are touched.
Social media is a slippery slope; if you get in the habit of creating loving posts, you could just as easily fall into updating statuses that air out your beau’s dirty laundry.
We are all human; we all make mistakes and say things in the heat of the moment, but don’t immortalize your feud with a keyboard. Think before you type; do you really want to broadcast that emotional kick to the balls?
So, for all of the reasons listed above, no matter how romantic or stressful your love life is, you should generally keep it to yourself if you want it to last.
Relationships are rollercoasters, except there’s more than just ups and downs; there are spins, loops and sometimes, the ride even goes backwards.
Keep hands, feet, arguments and affection in at all times. Unless someone is riding that rollercoaster with you, he or she shouldn’t be pulling the brakes or adding fuel to the fire.
Trust is the glue that holds relationships together, but privacy is the fan that dries and secures that glue.
All things considered, you should make it known that you’re together, but keep private moments private.