5 Reasons Why Venting About Your Relationship Problems Isn't Helping
Here’s the problem society has nowadays: We tell our relationship issues to people who aren’t involved or may not really care as much as we think.
A relationship is between two people, and in order for it to work, it needs to remain that way.
Let me give you some background information. I’ve been on and off with my boyfriend for over two years. We’ve broken up twice, and today, we are dating again.
He’s my best friend, but the issue was I told too many people all the bad without mentioning the good.
In case you may not have picked up on it, not many people were happy when I said we were back together, but I was and that’s what matters.
So, here’s my advice to you:
1. When something goes wrong, do not go telling the world.
If he didn’t send you a good morning text, I promise it isn’t the end of the world.
He probably got caught up and was waiting for you to text him first. Guys won’t admit it, but they like to know you’re thinking of them, too. Don’t hesitate to send him an “I love you” just because.
2. Let out your frustrations in a way that isn't venting.
I understand you may want someone to confide in when things aren’t going perfectly, but it’ll be better in the long run if you go blow off some steam at the gym, or if you’re more like me, I prefer Netflix and a bowl of ice cream.
There are so many ways to release stress, so instead of running your mouth in the moment, take a breather and go do something you enjoy for an hour or two.
We all have bad days, especially when the smallest things can get under our skin, so just take a step back before you say anything.
3. Realize that bad-mouthing your SO won't fix the problem.
The thing couples don’t seem to understand is that your friend who you may confide in isn’t going to fix the problem for you. The only person who can help solve the problem is the person involved, your significant other.
Sometimes, we may want advice and that’s completely normal, but be careful you aren’t bad-mouthing your boyfriend because judgments may form whether they mean to or not.
4. Take time to think it over.
Most likely, the problem isn’t as big as you may think. I’ll admit I have a quick fuse, and sometimes, we can’t help ourselves to react as humans.
The thing I’ve learned is to just wait it out until you realize the severity of the issue at hand. Go have a girls' night with your friends to get your mind off an issue that might not be too big, and I guarantee you’ll wonder why you and your boyfriend were having a problem at all.
5. But, DO NOT overthink it.
I am so guilty of this, and I know we’ve all been there. We’ve had our fair share of heartbreaks, and we hope the next one is different.
I get it, but you can’t let the past affect what could be an amazing future with someone else.
You’re beautiful inside and out, so don’t let a guy make you feel any different. Have confidence and it’ll turn into a healthy loving relationship.
At the end of the day, as humans, we have the habit of voicing our concerns and difficulties to our friends, which can create more of an issue.
We don’t mention the fact that our partners brought us our favorite smoothie just because, or left us cute notes in our rooms for us to find later.
So, before your words affect a potentially awesome relationship, make sure to keep it between the two of you. In a relationship you’re the only two who matter. Don’t forget that.