Young Love: 7 Tips For Successfully Living With Your Partner Before Marriage

by Carolyn Gladd

Let’s face it: Moving in with your boyfriend or girlfriend is a significant leap in your relationship. Years ago, it was rare for a couple to live together without being married. Now, couples becoming roomies before they're ready to tie the knot is pretty common.

Here's one myth you've probably heard: Living together before marriage will end in a messy, unhappy breakup. This myth was most likely conceived by people who cohabited without marrying when it was extremely against society's norms.

However, it was each couple’s individual qualities that led to relationship disasters, not the mere fact that they moved in together prior to exchanging vows.

So, if you are considering moving in with your lover, don’t be scared of rejection from society. Do think about what cohabiting means to you, as well as the following tips for your relationship to thrive while your significant other takes on another role as your roommate:

1. You must be on the same page.

If living together is only temporary, or you are not rushing into marriage, then your partner should know! Think about what marriage means to you.

If you want to get married, and are hoping that moving in with your significant other will either halt that process or expedite it, then talk about it!

This open conversation about where each of you stands and your thoughts about marriage will be very helpful to your relationship, eliminate awkward confusion and decrease the likelihood of fighting. Scooting that big elephant out of the room will be a lot easier than you think.

2. Be fair.

Lovers tend to do each other favors, but living together could cause tension when somebody is slacking. It is important to make your living situation fair.

This doesn’t mean splitting the chores directly in half, but it may require some compromising. Based on your work schedules and other obligations, it should become clear who should do what in order for neither one of you to feel taken advantage of.

Yes, chores might be a boring discussion, but you don’t want neglected dirty dishes to bother you on your way out the door!

3. Find the perfect balance where you don’t give up your independent life while still making time for each other.

Living together means that you will see one another quite often, but don’t stop planning dates so the two of you have the chance to spruce up for each other. At the same time, don’t ditch girls’ night just because he doesn’t have plans.

4. Surprise! Your partner is not perfect.

Well, neither are you. Frankly, nobody is. Maybe he leaves the seat up, or she talks too loudly in the mornings. Remind yourself of all of your partner's good qualities before nagging. Positive thoughts bring a positive life, after all.

5. Do not feel obliged or rushed to move in with your partner just because it seems like the easiest thing to do.

This is your relationship at stake, and it is more important for you to feel 100 percent comfortable and ready to live with your significant other than to try to please anyone else.

Your significant other will respect any decision you make, and if he or she doesn't, do you really want to split rent with this person?

6. Have fun!

There aren’t any rules to a relationship, and every relationship is different. Do whatever delights your soul! You’re young and free.

7. Watch your relationship grow!

Remember that this is just the beginning; there is plenty of time to enjoy your blossoming connection.

Photo via We Heart It