Relationships

Why Men Should Be Straight Forward

by Ally Batista

Guys think that they have it all figured out. Sometimes they do, but most of the time they have no idea.  I’m talking about being straightforward. Telling girls what you want with them before you do anything.

Guys: have you ever been in a situation where you upset a girl, or broke her heart, or made her really angry because you weren’t straightforward about something, resulting in you having to deal with her wrath? Of course you have, but think back to that time.

Let’s say you meet a girl out and you’re interested in getting with her. You go about your usual routine of trying to get her to go home with you. Oops, it didn’t work. This girl is playing hard to get but she has a look in her eye that says, “Eventually, but I want you to work for it.”

You decide that’s fine. Your Xbox is broken and the new Madden hasn’t come out anyway, so this could be fun and entertaining for you. You get her number and start all over again tomorrow. In your mind you’re thinking that you have to talk to this girl a little, get her to like you (by letting her think that you are interested in more than just sex) and then you’ll be able to sleep with her.

 

Okay, it worked. You’re in the clear now. You can just go about your usual business, never respond to any of her text messages or calls and just pretend like it never happened. Wrong. You can’t do that because now this girl is pissed off that you led her on and wants you to know it. You fucked up. You’re not supposed to let a girl on to believe that you have true feelings for her and not just feelings down in your pants.

There are a few different types of girls: the girl who will go home with you on the first night, the girl who wants you to work for it a little because she enjoys the game and will sleep with you after she’s gotten her fair share of fun, the girl who will only sleep with you if you’re somewhat talking for an extended period of time and about to date, and the girl who flat out won’t sleep with you no matter what.

Look at all of those options, guys. If the girl you’re interested in sleeping with is a girl who either won’t do it unless you’re dating, or won’t do it unless she feels like you’re about to date, and you have no intention of either of those things, abort mission. There are plenty of girls out there who will give you what you want.

The thing that guys don’t understand is that saying, “Listen, you’re cool, but I just want to hang out and casually have sex every once in a while-- absolutely nothing serious,” can work. Letting the girl know ahead of time what your intentions are will avoid confusion, frustration, and anger.

Of course, this only works with the first two types of girls, but it does work. It’s not even that girls think that you’ll end up dating and have a serious committed relationship if you tell them you like them. And that’s why they’re upset; (Well, in some instances that can be the case) it’s just annoying to be lied to. If it doesn’t work, oh well; get out there and try again. There are millions of girls out there to sleep with.

It’s also a bad look for guys to lie to a girl to get what he wants because that’s childish behavior. Unless you’re trying to sleep with a girl who is in high school, (God help you if you are) you don’t need to lie to her. We’re all adults here, and I highly doubt that a girl will be emotionally torn up that a guy she’s known for a week doesn’t want to actually date her.

This certainly varies from girl to girl. You could use this method on some girl you meet tonight, and she could be a fucking psychopath and not listen to anything you say and come up with illusions of grandeur in her mind. In this case, I unfortunately have no idea how to help you.

Elite.

Photo Credit: Getty Images