Getting Over A Breakup 101: 8 Lessons In Coping With Heartbreak

by Martinique Jobin

Class is in session, and I'm here to teach you, "Getting Over a Breakup 101."

Breakups suck. There, I said it. I know you're thinking, "Well, duh." But, the thing that sucks most about breakups is they're almost equivalent to having someone in your life pass away.

One day you're in love — texting each other constantly, planning weekend activities — and the next day, this person has essentially vanished!

You don't hear from this person; you don't know where he or she is, what he or she is doing, or whom this person is with.

Breakups are almost like going through withdrawal.

You may or may not know it, but love has the same effect on your brain as cocaine. Love gives you a feeling of euphoria, and once it's gone, you get a big slap in the face (with a sledge hammer).

And, you know that pain in your heart? It's real. As you go through your whirlwind of emotions, your heart rate increases and decreases, which causes you actual physical pain.

And, what's worse? Your brain shares a neural pathway for physical and emotional pain, so seeing a picture of your ex is basically the same as getting kicked in the balls.

Your mind also becomes so accustomed to consistently having this person in your life that once the routine is broken, it throws your body off even more.

But, there's always a light at the end of the tunnel -- here are some review sheets to keep in mind:

Biochemistry 186

Your brain will eventually get its chemistry back to normal and adapt to not having that-person-who-must-not-be-named in your life.

Managing Your Time 204

Time heals everything! It's clichéd, but it's true. Although this varies from person to person, you'll probably feel better by the time your favorite TV show starts up again.

Psychology of Depression 101

It's really all psychological, so the longer you dwell on it, the longer the pain will linger. Mourn and be sad; it's a natural and healthy way to cope.

However, don't wallow in your misery for too long! We don't want you to end up like Britney Spears circa 2007.

Social Media 282

Delete your ex from everything. This is hard when you want to keep the memories, but it's the only way to fully get over him.

You don't want to known when he was "last seen" on WhatsApp or know what new "friends" he's adding on Facebook. Just don't do that to yourself!

Project Management 206

Keep busy. Take this time to focus on you! You can start a new hobby, reconnect with the friends you ditched for your ex or even throw yourself into a new project.

One of the many good things about being single is you now have all the time in the world for yourself, and no one has to dictate your time except you!

English Literature 305

In the words of Ernest Hemingway, "The most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much, and forgetting that you are special, too." You're great, and you will find someone else. (Honestly!)

Introduction to Philosophy 100

Sometimes, the bad things that happen in our lives put us directly on the path to the best things that will ever happen to us. Embrace the good with the bad.

Life 400

One day, you'll meet the person who will show you why it never worked out with your ex. You'll have an, "Oh, I get it now," kind of moment.

So again, breakups are bad and can f*ck you up (like Owen Wilson's nose f*cked up), but everything does happen for a reason.

Never regret anything that has happened in your life. It cannot be changed, undone or forgotten. So, take it as a lesson and move on.

Life doesn't get easier or more forgiving, but we do get stronger and more resilient.

And, hopefully, you will end up with the person who fills your belly with butterflies and makes you stupid happy.