Science Says This Is How To Get Your Unrequited Crush To Like You

by Sheena Sharma
Stephen Morris

I have some good news for all you people out there who are hopelessly in love with your crush, but just can't get that someone to love you back.

According to a new study published on Psychology Today, if you falsely project your own personal romantic desires onto your friend, you could have a romantic "in" with that friend. By projecting your desires on your crush, you could pursue that friend by flirting, engaging in more physical, playful contact and maybe even expressing your desires.

This phenomenon, examined by researchers Noah Wolf and Edward LeMay, is a self-fulfilling prophecy. The prophecy operates under the following two assumptions: Your expectations of the unrequited love turning into actual love lead you to treat the friend differently, and that friend then changes his or her behavior toward you due to your treatment of them.

In other words, if you act like the friend you're crushing on actually likes you back, even though he doesn't, then he'll be more likely to like you back. Confidence plays a huge factor here. Less confident people don't project these desires onto the people they have feelings for, which actually ends up hurting their cause. Interesting, right?

Still, there's a loophole to the study, so don't go jumping for joy just yet. The friend you like will only be more likely to like you back if he or she already thinks you're generally a catch, but romantic chemistry isn't there for whatever reason.

The article states, "If the friend generally thought the participant was undesirable, then no amount of romancing could change that." And that makes sense. There is no amount of confidence in the world that could change a person or create feelings where there simply are none.

Bottom line is, muster up some courage and act like you're the most desired person in the world. It's not a guaranteed in, but by doing it, you may just have a shot with the guy.