How To Get Over Common Relationship Fears
Before getting into one, you have the perception that a relationship will bring you anything but fear. You think having an SO will offer you comfort, give you the best friend you've been looking for and most importantly, take away that dreaded lonely feeling.
In reality, relationships are anything but comfortable. If yours is, get out of it now.
Instead, they are full of fears.
Like, how do you know when it's right to take the next step? Are you moving too fast? What should you do if you get hit on in a bar by a beautiful man? It quickly becomes obvious the single, carefree life is far easier.
That being said, there are plenty of good things about a relationship too, like shared bills, date nights and someone to "Netflix and chill" with. Oh, and being with someone you love, I guess?
There are so many things to be enjoyed. You might just find you have to get over some relationship fears first.
1. Committing To A Title
Having to actually call someone your boyfriend or girlfriend is pretty damn serious. You're not just committing to a title: You're agreeing to think for someone else.
Essentially, you are saying you will be together for some time. You will be totally faithful, and you will consider the other person in everything you do.
Goodbye selfish, single days. It's a pretty intimidating step.
The best way to overcome this fear is to take it one day at a time. Often, we are daunted by any commitment that's required for a length of time.
But you just have to remember a relationship is not as set in stone as it might seem. If Kim Kardashian can say "I do" and then change her mind 72 days later, you can ditch your SO if you get caught up in the romance and think you've made a mistake.
2. Moving In Together
At first, couples just can't seem to get enough of each other when they get into a relationship. It's sweet, but it doesn't last.
If your SO doesn't irritate you, then, well, how? It doesn't mean you shouldn't be together; it just means some "you" time is key to a healthy relationship.
So, how does that work when you move in together? What are you supposed to do when you can't escape easily?
It's a big commitment to agree to live together. But you just have to make sure you establish some ground rules for your own space before you do.
As a result, you can enjoy the positives, like cheaper rent, halving the food bill and a shared Netflix account. Oh, and getting to wake up next to the person you love each day (not quite as good, but still).
3. Being Apart
If you thought spending too much time together was hard, wait until you have to spend time apart. When someone becomes a part of your everyday life, it's pretty daunting to think you might have to spend time away from each other.
Whilst it's inevitable in a relationship – and actually really healthy – to be separate from each other, it's completely normal to worry about it.
You just have to remember that time away from your SO helps you remember how to be alone. This makes you all the more appreciative that you don't have to be.
If you trust each other, fear of time apart should just be down to missing one another. In the digital age, that's fairly easy to manage. Thank you, social media for your constant updates and FaceTime.
No one wants to be the jealous partner. We always vow to never be before we get into a relationship.
You promise yourself you will be the chill partner, the one who's completely approachable and always trusting.
Let's be honest: You won't be. One smile from the opposite sex to your partner will have you rolling your eyes.
It doesn't mean you don't trust each other. Jealously is just human nature. In fact, more often than not, it sparks passion.
I promise, guys: Your crazy jealous girlfriend is cute on the inside.
The most important thing to remember is relationship fears are completely normal. Any relationship that looks completely put together is just deceiving.
We are all as fearful as each other. But push past the fears, and you will quickly realize that big leap of faith was completely worth it.