The Lost Art: 7 Simple Ways To Be A Gentleman
In today's fast-paced culture, chivalry has become almost nonexistent. Long gone are the heralded and lauded acts of kindness and chivalry that made men gentlemen, rather, that have given way to a culture that has fostered detachment from society.
Man’s ability to emotionally connect has fallen to the wayside and resulted in an inability to go out of the way for others. We here at Elite Daily always strive to be the best version of ourselves, and with these seven simple gestures, we hope it will bring out the inner gentleman in you.
This simple act has become so rare nowadays that some people seem taken back when it actually happens. Honestly, how much effort does it take to open a door for someone? How many precious seconds do you expend holding a door for people?
As Nike says, just do it! This effortless act should be routine in your life. When walking with your girl or some friends, simply walk faster than them, open the door, wait till everyone passes, then follow.If there are people behind your group, hold the door open for them, too. It’s simply common courtesy.
Pro Tip: Open the car door for your lady every time you get in and out of your vehicle.
Wait For The Women To Be Seated
This slight act gives an allusion of caring and protection for your lady. When you’re with a female and about to be seated, - be it at a restaurant, theater, or bus - let her pick the seats, let her sit down first, and then you can sit down.
Letting her pick the seats means you take into consideration where she wants to sit and stand until she sits because her preferences come before yours. This act is simply gentlemanly. Also, if you’re taking public transportation and someone is in your vicinity in need of the seat more than you, offer it.
This applies to the elderly, pregnant women, mothers with children in tow, and whoever looks like they need a seat.
Pro Tip: When a lady is exiting/standing up from her seat, stand up as well. This is an antiquated act that is almost nonexistent and might raise a few eyebrows, but it looks damn impressive. It might take a while to get comfortable pulling it off, and if you’re too self-conscious about it, then don’t do it.
Be On Time
This is possibly one of the biggest social faux pas in existent, yet it is ubiquitous! As a gentleman (or a decent human being), you should always strive to be on time. I doubt that your life is just so much more important than your friend’s that you just ignore proper etiquette of being on time.
Not only is it rude, but also, you are sending a blatant message that you do not care about the people you are making wait. What’s the point of setting a time to meet if you’re outright going to ignore it? Gentlemen are considerate to others and are always prompt.
Pro Tip: If you know you are going to be late because something came up (i.e., heavy traffic, helping save a neighbor’s car stuck in a tree), send a courtesy text or call. DO NOT say you are five minutes away when you are still in bed.
Carry The Burden
If you are with your lady and you went shopping, or you are going to the beach, moving, etc., offer to carry most of the things. Chances are, you are bigger and stronger than your girl so act like it. Don’t be the douche letting your girl lug around the beach cooler, while you’re chilling with lawn chair.
Pro Tip: For those living at home, go help your parents with the groceries when they come home from the supermarket.
Give Sincere Compliments
We place emphasis on the “sincere” part. Most people can smell bullsh*t coming from a mile away, especially from a guy. Do not try to force compliments, just genuinely compliment people whenever you want. And this does not stringently apply to just those you are familiar with; go ahead and compliment a stranger if you’re digging his outfit or her smile.
A small compliment can go a long way in making someone’s day. A gentleman always looks to brighten up someone’s day.
Pro Tip: Compliment your parents, too! Or just tell them you love them.
Smile And Use Eye Contact
A great way to dissuade people from getting to know you better is to avoid eye contact. Maybe you’re shy, but it’s rude to consistently avoid eye contact. At worst, people get offended, and at best, people see you as a beta male who’s scared to look someone in the eye.
This is a crucial social skill you need to foster. If it proves difficult, make a conscious effort to look people in the eye when you engage in conversation. And remember, there’s a fine line between eye contact and creepily staring into someone’s eyes.
Also, smile a lot! A nice smile is such an innocent, disarming tool. It shows people you are accessible and happy: two awesome traits in a person. Gentlemen know how to use both of these essential social tools.
Pro Tip: If you’re uncomfortable smiling because you do not want to show off your teeth, that is something you can mend. Get braces, get teeth whiteners, or master the art of flossing. A confident smile goes a long way.
When conversing with people, pay attention to what they are saying. Do not go off into adventurous daydreams or keep trying to sneak glances down a girl’s shirt. You can only get away with “I’m sorry, I forgot your name. What was it again?” for so long.
It really brightens up a person’s day when you remember intimate details about his or her life because it may have been mentioned in passing (i.e., your girl prefers dark chocolate over milk chocolate, or your cousin hates oysters but loves clams), but you remembered it.
Pro Tip: Get the name down on the first try. After meeting someone, use their name in the sentence to make it easier to remember: “It’s so nice to meet you, ____.”
Top photo: Tumblr