Dating

Memories of Christmas Past: Don't Let Ex-Boyfriend Nostalgia Ruin The Holidays

It’s that time of the year again! The season devoted to giving thanks and spending time with people you love. The only thing different about this year? You’re single. Inevitably, you find yourself reflecting on past holiday seasons when you found yourself, well, happier.

Its not that you want to be a Grinch, but remember the first Christmas after finding out a man in a red suit wasn’t sneaking through your chimney? Some years are just more magical than others.

Personally, I find ex-boyfriend nostalgia an unavoidable aspect of the holiday season. It isn’t that I yearn for material possessions; I’ve always found gift exchanges kind of awkward anyways. Regardless, tis’ the season for romantic Instagram posts and Mariah Carey’s “All I Want For Christmas Is You.”

Seeing what seems like everyone I know in a jolly-ass relationship reminds me of past Christmas seasons where I too had someone to kiss under the mistletoe (sorry that was lame).

Momentarily you forget why things didn’t workout between you and your ex, or even the undeniable fact that you no longer possess feelings for the person. Instead, all of the “potential” the two of you had is the only thing on your mind.

Despite everything you dislike about this person, in these confusing moments you can only bring yourself to reflect on exactly how you felt last Christmas. He sure did look cute in that sweater.

This year, instead of bringing along physical evidence that you are dating someone, you will be forced to answer questions. “So, how’s the love life?” asked by nearly every family member ever.

It isn’t just the fact that they are blatantly prying into your personal life, it’s the fact that so much rides on this single question. If you say “non-existent” you will run the risk of an extensive pep talk about how “Mr. Right” is out there looking for you.

Or even worse, “Why’d you guys break up? We loved him!” I’m never entirely sure how to respond to this one. Do you actually want my answer? He cheated on me with a handful of 18-year-olds, neglected to tell me he had gonorrhea, found me inadequate and dumped me via Facebook.

(Okay, none of those things were true...but what if they were?)

Generally if I’m single I usually just say I’m “seeing someone.” Usually I’m just seeing that person every-other weekend after 2 a.m., but I leave that part out. Modern day romance, baby. Maybe I’m not being entirely honest, but I feel like everyone wins this way.

My relatives can leave the dinner table confident there is a wedding with an open bar in the near future, and I don’t have to get “set up” on a date with their grocer’s son.

Love is f*cking everywhere—music, movies and those damn proposal videos that fill our entire news feeds. While it is easy to feel excluded from what appears to be surrounding us, it is important to remember your relationship for what it actually was, not just at Christmastime.

This year I may not have someone to take pictures with me in front of the tree, but at the end of the day I am grateful. I am thankful for the lack of obligation to buy red and white lingerie that is both tasteless and overpriced, to have girlfriends who are my soul mates and that full bottle of red wine to myself.

Top Photo Courtesy: Super Tr4mp