Relationships

10 Must-Haves For The Couple Who Prefers To Stay In On The Weekends

by Bobby Box

Since I've recently purchased a home and gotten engaged, staying in has become a wiser decision for me.

The money that used to be spent on cabs, copious amounts of beer and drunken burritos is being put to better, more substantial use.

So now, my fiancée and I have embraced our low-key evenings together and have, if not reluctantly, become a couple who prefers to stay in.

And we've come to realize that it's kind of the best.

We have no expectations, nobody to impress and, best of all, no pants! Who needs to wake up with a splitting headache and an empty wallet once flush with crisp 20s? Not this guy.

So instead of dressy attire and a cover charge, these are the items we've adopted instead:

1. Two bottles of reasonably priced wine

Since this is just a simple, unassuming evening and not some social situation where your alcohol is judged by hipsters with a trust fund, you settle for a cheaper wine.

You've undoubtedly tried to make it with just one bottle before, but you soon realized it wasn't nearly enough. You might not be going out, but you sure as hell won't be sacrificing your buzz.

2. A Netflix subscription

Waiting for scheduled TV programming is below us impatient Millennials, so we tend to favor Netflix as our primary television source.

So when something like a new season of "Orange is the New Black" is finally released, all bets are off for your evening in.

For all you guys know, you could both be embarking on an unexpected all-nighter, depending on how dramatic each episode's cliffhanger happens to be.

3. A bowl of chips or popcorn to pick at until you decide to order something more substantial

You start simply enough, placing a bowl of chips or popcorn between you, which you'll both delicately pick at through the first few episodes of whatever you're watching.

However, as each glass of wine reaches its fateful end, you both yearn for something more substantial.

You weigh the pros and cons of ordering delivery, and the pros always outnumber the cons because you're both getting drunk. And nothing is better than drunkenly demolishing takeout.

4. Ample pillows

The more pillows you have the better, am I right?

I mean, when you're streaming a series and you're not in a bedroom, you want whatever piece of furniture you're sitting on to feel as close to a bed as possible.

5. The warmest of blankets

Like I mentioned, you want your couch to feel as close to a bed as possible. In fact, my fiancée and I actually bring our bed comforter downstairs. Just snuggle up under a big, fluffy blanket, toss in the aforementioned pillows and you're all set.

6. Your phones

Yes, we all know you're still going to browse Instagram, check emails, scroll through others' Snapchat stories and test out the latest interactive filters. Just accept it.

7. Your Sunday "best"

No, I don't mean what you'd wear to church. In this instance, I'm talking about your most comfortable attire that you'd lounge in on the weekends.

For me, it's loose-fitting boxers paired with an even looser muscle shirt. Sexy? Not so much. Ideal for staying in? You betcha.

8. A theater-like atmosphere

Since movie tickets are overpriced and you probably don't want to listen to that one asshole shout his own assumptive narrative throughout the film, you try your best to replicate the dark, dim atmosphere of a movie theater in your own home (without the sticky floors).

9. A partner to wake the other up so you can go to bed

One of you will always fall asleep before your streaming session is officially over, so it's the other person's responsibility to get the sleeper to bed.

It's also that person's responsibility to turn off all the lights, lock the doors and shut the house down for the night.

10. Access to more alcohol, just in case

You never know how the wine's going to hit you.

If you've had a particularly rough day, and you're looking for something a little stiffer, ensure there's ample liquor in your house. Vodka or whiskey usually does the trick.