Cinderella To Tinderella: Why Dating Apps Aren't Going To Find You A Husband

by Isabelle Zanzer

Men are like shoes: If you choose the wrong pair, you'll end up hurt and uncomfortable, counting down the minutes until you can take them off.

But, if you choose the right pair, you'll walk gracefully with confidence.

So, think about: Are you going shopping for just shoes? Or, are you going shopping for the perfect fit?

We live in a world where we are pressured by society, our family, our peers and our friends to be in relationships.

Even your friend's mom interrogates you as to why you didn't come with a date to her daughter's wedding.

You're at the place in your life where half of your friends are getting married, and the other half still use Tinder.

So, what do you do? You join the crowd and begin shopping for the ideal partner on Tinder.

All you need is your mobile phone and your thumb (with a glass of wine in the other hand, of course).

After a few swipes, the wine starts kicking in, and you've found your match. He asks you out that very night.

Your candlelit dinner at one of the hottest restaurants in the city couldn't have gone better.

The conversation went smooth, and you didn't have any awkward pauses you're used to experiencing in other dates.

His smile is perfect; his eyes are filled with kindness, and every touch sends a spark through your body.

You don't even feel butterflies in your stomach. Instead, you feel the f*cking zoo.

He raises his wallet as the check comes and pays the full amount, leaving a generous tip for the waiter.

You sit in silence, thinking about all the times you paid half the bill, or even the full amount when the man explained, ''I forgot my wallet at home...''

He insists on walking you home, and you joke about forgetting your pepper spray at your friend's place, since you usually carry it in your purse when going out with men you meet on Tinder.

He gives you his jacket, and you continue to enjoy each other's company as you walk down the streets, catching glances of jealous looks women throw at you, wishing it was them strolling with such arm candy.

You approach your front door, and you don't even get the chance to say goodbye before you feel his lips on yours.

You fight back the urge to not take it too far on the first date, but his gentle kiss didn't give you much of a chance.

Taking out your keys while carrying on your public display of affection, your front door slams open as he continues taking your breath away down the hall.

No, this isn't another take on a "Fifty Shades of Grey" novel, so I'll let you use your imagination about what went on until the morning.

With the sun shining in your face, you gently open your eyes to an empty side of the bed.

You look for a sweet note that says something along the lines of, "Went to get breakfast — be back in 20," only to find he didn't leave one.

Half an hour turns into an hour, which then turns into two or three hours. You finally realize you were just an easy one-night stand.

Attempting to control the tears in your eyes, you give in and break down. Your only sense of relief comes from the fact no one can see you crying your heart out.

You spend the next week going over every insignificant detail of that night, thinking of what you could have done differently.

As time heals everything, you eventually realize not all guys are looking for easy hookups, and so you continue swiping left until the next date.

But, the cycle repeats itself.

According to Aaron Smith, a senior researcher at the Pew Research Center and expert in the growing impact of mobile technologies, 5 percent of Americans who are currently married or in long-term partnerships met their partners somewhere online.

Only 5 percent are in successful relationships, and let's not forget the fact one in five adults have used online dating.

From articles titled, "10 Reasons This Generation Is Losing The Ability To Be In Love" to "We Don't Date Anymore: How The Hook-Up Culture Is Killing Hollywood," I find I'm never really shocked by the absence of ever-lasting love in our lives.

Women tend to devaluate themselves, while men do the exact opposite.

Why is that? Why is it that when we see others settle down, we view it as them only doing what is expected of them?

Or, worse, why do we end up seeing that in ourselves? Why have we stopped believing in the concept of love?

Why do we refuse to believe our other halves are out there, and we'll meet them when we least expect it?

Why don't we just break our endless merry-go-round pattern and decide to go for quality over quantity?

Despite the wealth of digital tools that allow people to search for potential partners, as well as the fact one in 10 Americans are now using one of the many online dating platforms, the vast majority of relationships still begin offline.

Even among Americans who have been with their significant others for five years or less, 88 percent say they met their partners offline.

So, put down your phones and look around you. The man of your dreams may be standing right in front of you, and you might miss him if you're too busy swiping left for sex.

Have expectations about love; have standards you refuse to lower. Love yourself enough not to be the easy option, but the one worth fighting for.

Because, if no one told you so already, you are worth it.