She Lets You Be Who You Are: Why You Should Date A Girl With Baggage

by Chelsea Forbes-Terry

It seems like most guys these days always list the same thing about finding a girl they want to “date date" instead of just hook up with.

The list usually includes being engaging, outgoing, fun to look at, good in the sack and drama-free.

This is always followed up with some conversation about how their ex was crazy, and “girl drama is the worst drama.”

Yada, yada, yada.

My first reaction thought about this is wondering how exactly they intended to find a girl “without drama.”

Girls definitely have more flair for the dramatics in life, especially in our 20s.

There’s the drama of living paycheck to paycheck, moving up in your career, making a name for yourself and growing apart from some of your friends as they venture into different phases of their lives.

The reason so many reality TV shows feature 20-somethings doing 20-something things is because all you have to do is add a little alcohol and you pretty much have the soap opera that is life in your 20s.

My second thought is more feminist in nature. You never hear girls talk about wanting to be with a guy, except, “without all that boy drama.”

When a guy is going through stuff, or just dealing with life’s roller-coaster twists and turns, he’s “becoming emotionally mature." If a girl does the same thing, she has “too much baggage.”

But, why not date a girl with baggage? A girl with baggage has been through things; she has dealt with making tough decisions and overcoming great obstacles.

She knows the difference between the fabricated drama girls who haven’t been through anything make up, and wisely chooses not to participate in it.

The woman who carries past experiences with her has learned not to judge your past because she truly understands what it means to grow up and learn from past mistakes.

If you date a woman with baggage, she will have learned how to let go of the experiences that do not serve her, thus making her stronger when more things start to pile on.

She will teach you how to store your own luggage behind you and stand proudly by your side while you work through new ones.

Some might call her fearless, but you will see that she only seems fearless because she surrounds herself with friends and family who encourage and support her no matter what.

Who wouldn’t want to be with this type of person? Who wouldn’t want to date a woman like her?

Because, yes, dating a woman with baggage means you’ll have to be okay with someone who won’t let you ignore the problems in your life.

She will openly communicate with you about her feelings and emotions and will want you to do the same.

There is no feeling she hasn’t felt before and she will be able to guide and navigate her way through them without becoming closed off and shutting you out.

She will expect you to ask for help when things are hard because she has learned that’s the only way you can get through the tough stuff, the scary stuff, the stuff you feel like you can’t tell anyone.

In asking for help, she has built up a sort of compassion that draws you to her and inspires you to be the same way.

Her past experiences make her passionate, too. Maybe losing someone close to her made her realize the fragility of life.

Perhaps, having little has made her better with money and helped her form an appreciation for what little she has.

It could be that her body issues have made her understand what beauty is in a whole new way, accepting who she is in whatever form her physical body has decided to take.

She loves deeper, works harder and isn’t fazed by what other people think because she has such a solid foundation.

She won’t even need you; all she needs is herself.

I’m tired of guys who say they’d rather contract herpes than be saddled to a girl with “too much drama.”

I'm tired of the guys who see a girl who has faced many challenges in her life and label her as a type of girl to avoid.

That guy isn’t the kind of guy you want in your life, anyway.