Get It Together: Why Being Classy Will Always Beat Being Hot
There have been a million studies with a million subjects by a million psychologists and analysts about human attraction.
Whether it's facial symmetry, feminine bodily curves or masculine strength, these traits have been dissected in order to understand why we are attracted to the people we are, and how best to fit the mold of an attractive individual.
I'm a fan of facts and science, but there is a trait that can't be quantified and studied through hormonal changes, brain scans and bar graphs.
It's a trait in personal presentation to the world.
In other words, it's being classy.
There is something to be said about class, grace and carrying yourself well, both in appearance and behavior.
When you see someone dressed well and say, "That is a classy look," that means it's a timeless, flattering style that accentuates the person's strong features.
But, it's also respectful and modest, showing good taste and high standards.
When you say, "That person is classy," you are saying he or she is a respectful, elegant individual who carries him- or herself well, with sophistication and good character.
Some personality traits associated with being classy are kind and good.
The person I wish to attract will be attracted to these traits.
In other words, if I were to be approached in a romantic context, I would rather have someone say I'm classy than say I'm hot.
Not only is it a high compliment in my book, but it is also a trait I look for in another.
Everyone has different tastes and his or her own definition of what is and is not attractive. But a standard that should be set is a level of class.
This will not only raise the bar in terms of human behavior (more manners, less public intoxication and unfavorable behavior), but it will also raise the level at which we present ourselves visually (more flattering cuts of clothing with modesty, less revealing and inappropriate wear).
I am in no way saying finding someone hot or sexy is a bad thing. That is also another form of flattery that can be appreciated.
But what's hot or sexy to me is class.
I wish to hold myself to this standard in my appearance and actions.
I would like to dress with a style and elegance that is both flattering to my body type and modest and respectful.
I would like to behave in a way that illustrates my manners, kind nature and good character.
While it has taken some time to get to this point in my life where I know what it means to be classy, it is better late than never.
In doing so, I have attracted the kind of person who holds these qualities in high esteem.
I don't need to wear a skin-tight dress, act loose or get drunk at a bar.
I don't have be overly flirtatious and forward or wear my hair a certain way in order to be deemed attractive.
As a woman, if you present yourself with elegance and class (think Grace Kelly), you can be true to yourself.
You can be a sophisticated and educated conversationalist who maintains modesty while upholding your femininity.
As a man, if you present yourself with elegance and class (think Clark Gable or Humphrey Bogart), you can impress women with your manners.
You can maintain a sense of strong masculinity, while remaining respectful and sensitive to those around you.
This showcases timeless style.
These elements of attraction last over time.
While the demand for class ebbs and flows with our culture, it is ever-present. It is something I hope to emulate in my daily life.