23 Reasons Why You Should Never, Ever Take A Nude Pic Again

by Ashley Fern

*This article is satire. The views expressed are the author's, and do not reflect the official position of Elite Daily.

By now everyone has heard about the celebrity naked picture hacking scandal. Its victims included Jennifer Lawrence, Kate Upton, Victoria Justice, Mary Elizabeth Winstead, Ariana Grande and Kirsten Dunst.

If this isn't enough reason never to send a nude photo again, I'm going to provide you with many, many more reasons. But first let me ask this question: Why are we so trusting of people with our privacy?

Shouldn't we know better in this technological era not to send a naked picture of us to someone else? How do you know this person won't pass along these images? You don't, and if you foolishly believe otherwise, well then you're probably going to be pretty sorry later.

So why should you stop taking nudies? Well...

1. Jennifer Lawrence

If it can happen to someone as lovable as J. Law, well then it could happen to you. It doesn't matter how flawless she looked in the leaked photos -- that's definitely not something you want happening to yourself.

2. Kate Upton

She's half naked all the time anyway, but it didn't stop someone from leaking nude photos of her. This just proves, regardless of your career, you are still at risk.

3. Because it's really hard to photoshop yourself on an iPhone

Have you ever tried slimming yourself down or enhancing your boobs on an iPhone? Oh, no? Yeah... me neither...

4. I've seen what happens firsthand when a guy receives a nudie

He saves it, he forwards it and he shows everyone around him. Please, like you didn't know that...

5. There's a Snapchat app that lets you save pictures without notifying the other person

You may think SnapChat is the safest way to send your nudies, but let's be real, there's always a loophole.

6. My dad would disown me

The last thing a father ever, ever wants to see is his daughter humiliated by nude photos. Could you imagine having to tell your parent that those types of images are floating around?

Yeah, good luck being able to look your dad in the eye ever again.

7. ...As would my grandparents

The generation gap between you and your grandparents is one that does not allow for the understanding of how and why you would ever send a nude picture.

They didn't even have that type of technology back in the day, so they will just be in utter disbelief as to why you have gone to this extreme.

8. The Internet

Anything that is put out in cyber space can and will come back to haunt you. It doesn't matter how secure you think you are being, once it's out there, it's out there forever.

9. Group chats

Guys have endless group chats for different things; you can basically safely guarantee there is at least two that will now be sporting your naked photos.

10. Memes

What if your nude photo inspired the next trend of grumpy cats? See, what I'm getting at here?

11. GIFs

What if your still-shots came to real life in GIF form? Do you really want your boobs bouncing across computer screens all over the world? Yeah, didn't think so.

12. Google

God takes a new form in Google, as it really is the all-knowing power about everything that has ever happened in the world. The last place you want to end up is on a Google image search but if it's the second page, you should be fine — totally kidding.

13. It gives the person you send it to ammo

What happens when the person you sent this photo gets pissed off at you? What if that person threatens you with these photos? Never, ever give someone that power over you.

14. Because even if you cut out your head, people can still identify you

All anyone has to do is align your naked photo with the picture you just uploaded from vacation. It's not that hard to figure out, especially with the technology that's out there today.

15. Your current career

Do you really want your current employer to see these images? You can bet your boss will not only see you in a completely different light, but he or she will also probably now have grounds to fire you.

16. Your future career

All any recruiter has to do is Google your name and voilà, nudies for everyone! This is most definitely not a good look at all, especially when on the job hunt.

17. Your unborn children

Do you really want your children to have to deal with your poor decisions? How do you think North West is going to feel once she realizes her mother became famous after making a sex tape...

18. You can't just send one

Have you ever met a guy who was satisfied with just one photo? They're like Pringles: Once you pop, the fun don't stop.

19. You can't really get that creative with them

There are only so many things you can do until you're sending the same picture over and over again.

20. The iCloud

What was supposed to be a safe haven of back-up information has now been hacked... so really, what is safe any longer?

21. You can send them to your brother by accident

Rookie mistake right here, but think of how many times you have sent a "wrong text." Do you really want these photos to be accidentally sent to your family members?

22. People never look at that "one" photo you're currently showing them

Have you ever shown a photo to someone only to have that person scroll through your entire camera reel? Yeah, that's a nerve-racking situation you don't want to deal with.

23. Because your iPhone doesn't have a private gallery

Playing off the above point, storing nudies in your phone would be a whole different ball game if there were private galleries. Although you can make separate folders, there is no actual "private" storage.

*This article is satire. The views expressed are the author's, and do not reflect the official position of Elite Daily.

Photo Courtesy: Instagram