He Might Be Asleep, He Might Be Gay: The 20 Reasons He's Not Responding To Your Texts

by Elizabeth Baugh

My­­ roommate recently ended a 10-month, hot-and-cold relationship with a guy who frequently seemed to fall off the face of the earth. They’d hang out, work out together, or occasionally hook up, and afterwards, he wouldn’t text her for a week or two. He was beginning to seem more like a friend than a love interest -- aside from that one “love you” text he sent. So, my roommate sent him a text, and in the nicest way possible, she told him she wasn’t cool with his little effort anymore. He never responded.

As she paced around the apartment giving me the scoop, we tried to figure out why this guy was the way he was. Yes, he has a hectic work schedule; yes, he’s close to his family and spends time with them on weekends; yes, he travels frequently. Is there really no time for a courtesy text, even? Where was he, and what was he doing?

Knowing that girls everywhere are wondering the same thing, we've come up with a few reasons he, or any guy, may not be responding to your text messages. Here are 20 things he could be doing instead of responding to you:

1. He’s on a plane.

Does he travel a lot for work? Maybe TSA officials confiscated his phone.

2. He forgot his phone at home.

We would never, ever leave our phone behind. But men are so forgetful, you know?

3. Work is so busy.

Most of us are busy at work, but come on, don’t you have a lunch break?

4. He told you his secret habits.

He binge-eats calzones and Mentos when he’s stressed, and honestly, he's afraid you’ll expose that.

5. He’s still in love with his ex.

You noticed he liked one of her Instagram photos. She is really, really pretty. He’s probably texting her instead.

6. He lost his phone.

It’s sitting on her nightstand.

7. He’s on his way over.

He’s just trying not to ruin the surprise.

8. He’s sleeping.

Who sleeps with their phone on silent?

9. He got a new phone and doesn’t recognize your area code.

Maybe he thinks you’re a colleague. But wait, didn’t your text say, “Wanna come over?”

10. He loves you so much that he’s paralyzed.

He physically cannot pick up the phone.

11. He’s gay.

The last thing this guy texted my roommate read: “It’s cold out. Got a new recipe rippin’ in the Crockpot!” Really, testing out new recipes? You never can tell.

12. His mom’s in town.

They’re at brunch, and he’s telling her all about you.

13. He’s planning your next date.

He can’t have any distractions!

14. He’s in the Witness Protection Program.

He did tell you he had a “crazy” ex-girlfriend.

15. He left his phone at the bar.

Easy to leave behind when you’re following your next one-night stand out the door.

16. He can’t commit to you.

He has a lot going on right now. He’s up for a promotion; he’s traveling; his mom’s in town... remember?

17. He’s intimidated by you.

Because you’re so great in bed.

18. The game is on.

There’s a beer in one hand and a buffalo wing in the other. He can hardly check his Fantasy Football stats, let alone respond to your text.

19. He can’t find the right words to say.

Your text was really heartfelt and he needs time to draft his response -- even if it takes two weeks.

20. He sucks.

He doesn’t like you.