I was never “girly” when I was younger. While I had some female friends, I never quite fit in. I just wasn't interested in playing house, dress-up or chasing butterflies. I spent a lot of time playing sports, video games and hanging out with my older brothers and the other boys on my street.
I never waxed my eyebrows or spent copious amounts of time painting my nails. I took a hardcore backpack to school instead of those cutesy shoulder bags that were so “in” during the 90s. I was rightfully branded as a "tomboy.” I was never really able to appreciate this seemingly discouraging title until my early 20s when I finally began dating.
Here's to the girls who never had a date to prom, but who instead helped choose them for her guy friends — there's hope for you yet. Here's what you can gain from your tomboy status:
A Deeper Level Of Comprehension
As a woman who has spent a lot of time interacting with the opposite sex, I’ve seen and come to understand how men behave around women whom they wish to bed versus women whom they wish to wed.
This reality is something of which a lot of women are not aware because they lack the connection with men and thus cling to a superficial understanding of a man’s true intentions. In addition, you will likely spend more time with men as they develop through puberty, which will allow you the ability to understand their vicissitudes like no other woman will.
Their Genuine Appreciation For Yourself
Your male friends will learn to respect you on a whole different level than they do other women. This appreciation gives way to more meaningful conversations with men because they also understand that you, as an individual, are separate from “other women.” A large part of the battle between the sexes is miscommunication. However, having spent so much time in your formative years with them on the playground, you will become a pro at communicating.
The idea is not for you to lose out on talking about things that interest you as a woman, but to learn how to approach those sometimes uninteresting topics with them. You will be fearless in your approach because you are used to interacting with men. And because they appreciate you, they will listen.
An Honest Outlook
Most importantly, you’ll learn what it is that men truly desire in a woman. All men are not the same and most have very different wants and needs. However, through your continued access to game nights and hours of hangout sessions, you will be able to pick up on some key signs that make that discernment much simpler to decode.
It will undoubtedly become easier for you to date because your natural female intuition mixed with your skill at understanding men will allow for less time wasted. They key is to know what you want, as well. Then, you will have minimal problems aligning your needs to that of your possible future.
I got the best of both worlds. When I finally decided to embody more of what was socially acceptable for a woman, I was all set. I never needed to learn to play “the game.” I was already aware of both sides and was thus, one step ahead of my female counterparts. That is the silver lining that is often left out while being teased relentlessly as you grow up for being a tomboy. Let’s be totally honest: understanding men is a skill many women will never master. Don’t let the skill go to waste!
Photo via We Heart It