I love my girlfriends and consider myself truly lucky to have so many awesome women in my life.
Once a week, we get together and have wine night. Even now, in our 20s and 30s, the girl talk we usually end up having is centered around the discussion of the men in our lives.
Some really great results can come from talking about your relationship with your girlfriends, such as the reassurance that, yes, that girl is trashy and your boyfriend should not have ever been talking to her.
If I am honest with myself, though, there are many dangers to conversing about the details of your relationship too often with your girlfriends. Here’s why:
Your girlfriends are only getting one side of the story.
Rarely do we get together and tell each other all of the amazing things our significant others do for us. Instead, we tend to focus on the negatives and tell each other about the fights, the bad moments. It is nice to have someone to whom you can vent, but if this is the only information your girls are hearing, they are likely to form some pretty negative opinions about your love.
Later on, it will inadvertently become more difficult for them to support the relationship when they have this file cabinet in their minds full of all the complaints you have ever made about your boyfriend.
Your girlfriends always think you are right.
There are a few women I have in my life who point out when I’m being a completely psychotic girlfriend, but most of the time, they side with me. The thing is, I am not always right. Sometimes I genuinely mess up, as all human beings do, and I need to be held accountable for it.
Women, in my opinion, tend to be more sensitive to criticism — even if constructive — when it comes from their friends. When we spend time talking with one another and assuring ourselves that we are most definitely right, we can create issues in the romantic relationship if, in fact, we were wrong.
Your girlfriends stop trusting your significant other.
We already established that your girlfriends are only getting one side of the story — a story in which you likely come across as pretty angelic contrasted to your devil of a boyfriend. It is a pretty well-known fact that women do not ever forget. The more you talk to your girls about your man, the more wrongs they will file away about him and the less they will trust him.
You can avoid a lot of unnecessary drama if you refrain from discussing the problems in your romantic relationship so much with your girlfriends. If you are going to talk about your boyfriend issues with friends — because, let’s be real, we all do it — try to balance it out by boasting about all the positives, too.
This might just help your relationship with your man… and his relationship with your girls.
Photo via We Heart It