The difference between men and women in relationships is that we put all our “crazy” upfront, whereas men like to drop it in the form of absurd requests.
Forget asking for nude photos or sexual favors, once your boyfriend feels comfortable enough (read: you won’t dump him on the spot) he’ll finally reveal his true self to you by asking you to fulfill his deep, dark wishes.
The sh*t we’ll (consider) do(ing) for men... AMIRIGHT?!
Girlfriends typically don’t ask for much -- some love, some attention, some pre-paid meals. Boyfriends, on the other hand, ask for some pretty weird stuff. Here’s all the craziest sh*t your boyfriend has asked you to do…
Editor’s Note: We’re just as sorry about all this ass-play as these women are. 1. The Golden Boy My ex read “50 Shades of Grey” and then asked if he could pee on me in the shower.
This is not a lie, sadly. But as you may have guessed, we broke up shortly after. He’s a nut job.
- Amy, 25 2. The Third Member My ex-boyfriend asked me for a threesome after two months of dating... with another dude. (Smiles.)
- Meagan, 24 3. The Ghost Dial My ex was majorly hungover and requested that I call his grown-up job, talk to his boss and call out sick on his behalf (which I did).
- Sara, 28 4. The Bad Boy I was dating this guy (if that's what we want to call it). One "date," he tried to convince me that I could make a quick $1,000.
All I had to do was wear a leather gimp mask (and nothing else) and spank another woman for 30 minutes on camera. It turns out he was a porn star.
We "dated" for another two months.
Elite Daily: Did you get paid?
In ways that have nothing to do with money. #Bless.
- Morgan, 26 5. The Lady Thief One time my (straight?) boyfriend asked me for my hairspray and facial moisturizer.
He also wears my underwear to bed all the time (without asking). I’M STILL DATING THE WEIRDO SO KEEP THIS SH*T ANON.
- Sue, 24 6. The Dinner Date My boyfriend asked me to wash my assh*le out. Really well. So he could eat it tomorrow.
- Amanda, 26 7. The Planner I once had a boyfriend who would say very strange sh*t to me. One of the things that sticks out was when he told me, 'prepare yourself because we're going to have anal in six months.'
Why six months? I don’t know! Also, that isn't something you just ANNOUNCE. Like, no, dude.
- Torie, 32 8. The Answer To Your Question If no one's asked me for any kind of butt stuff, am I ugly?
- Asking for a friend, 27 9. The Takeout Box A guy once asked me to eat his ass while he was on all fours. ANONYMITY IS TREASURED.
- Cassandra, 28 10. The Guy Most Likely To Be Arrested An ex-boyfriend I had asked:
1. to stick a glass beer bottle inside me
2. if we could role play that he was raping me…
- Cori, 25 11. The Brown-Noser One time my ex asked me to take a shower after I hung out with my guy friends because he could smell their cologne on me. I didn't have the heart to tell him it was actually vodka.
- Carly, 29 12. The Catcher My boyfriend had his heart set on tossing dishes in Ikea like frisbees.
It was still early on in the relationship, and I wanted to impress him with how fun I could be, so I went along with it. My "fun time" cost me $125 in damages.
- Jackie, 26 13. The Trade-Off ONE time, my ex boyfriend told me that if I agreed to quit smoking that I could peg him. If any of you don't know what that is: It's when you f*ck your boyfriend's buttonhole with a strap-on dildo. HOLLA!
Unfortunately, we broke up before I could make this happen.
- Sadie, 31 14. The Artist My ex-boyfriend and I were checking out a special exhibit at the Met.
I guess the combination of paint and silence got him so turned on, he asked me to have sex with him behind one of the tapestries. I did. And I could swear the security guard still winks at me.
- Sharon, 29 15. The Idiot Does the time he wanted to ditch our tour group and check out the West Bank (which was being shelled at the time) in Israel count? Because that was absolutely nuts.
- Laurie, 26 16. The Confused Dresser One night after going out in a short dress and sleeping at my beloved, weird boyfriend's house, I asked him if I could borrow sweatpants to walk back to my apartment in.
He leaves the bed and comes back in with a pair of his business casual khaki pants, telling me to just wear them home because they're essentially the same as sweatpants.
No, no they are not. I ended up settling for basketball shorts, but he's never offered khakis again after how hard I laughed.
- Alex, 22 17. The One Who Hath No Capacity To Be Asked No one’s ever wanted to date me though.
- Kristen, 25