Cranking the shank, flogging the hog, buffing the baloney: Whatever you want to call it, masturbation is a healthy, fun and common activity for both men and women.
So, why do so many women deny doing it?
Studies show that 70 percent and 50 percent of adult men and women masturbate, respectively.
According to Lena Dunham, even the kids are doing it.
A woman's sexuality is nothing to be ashamed of.
Yet when it comes to masturbation, men shamelessly admit the act, while many women claim they've never slipped a hand down under.
Hell, most guys start feeling themselves up when they're just wee little preteens.
But some women in their 20s — even some in their 30s — have never given it a go.
Women are more independent today than ever before, and we embrace the can-do attitude with pride.
So what's wrong with a little do-it-yourself activity every now and then?
While there are women who have no problem letting go of all inhibitions and shamelessly giving themselves some self-satisfaction, others have yet to take that leap.
We feel for them. Oh, how we feel for them.
Ladies, I've got news for you: Masturbation is good for you.
Not only that, but it's also good for your relationship.
So screw diamonds; my vibrator is my best friend.
Masturbation is a positive thing, and here are the reasons why:
1. It will make you happier.
It's simple. Orgasms release endorphins, and endorphins make you happy.
Elle Woods has realized it. When will you?
2. It can improve your sex life.
As much as we try to deny it to our men, we've all faked an orgasm a time or two (or 100).
But when you start masturbating, you get to know your body like you never have before.
You discover what does and doesn't work for you, and you can take that knowledge to the bedroom whenever your dude is struggling to find what makes your clit tick.
3. There are health benefits.
Ever wonder why you conk out after sex?
Well, there's a reason why those toe-curling climaxes make us want to hit the hay.
Orgasms physically and emotionally relieve the tension from your body, allowing you to fall asleep more quickly.
4. It's a definite way to release sexual tension.
Whether you've just gone through a breakup, are going through a dry spell or are taking a hiatus from men, women still have their needs.
Masturbating is a surefire way to satisfy your libido.
5. It makes orgasms 10 times better.
Every time you orgasm, the muscles on your pelvic floor get a workout.
These muscles control both the strength and the length of your orgasms.
So the stronger they are, the better your orgasms are.
6. It makes you more confident.
Nothing is more empowering than knowing what you want and how to get it.
The idea women only need to masturbate when they're single is bullsh*t.
Why deprive yourself of one thing when you have the other?
Do you deprive yourself of food when you have gallons of water?
No, I didn't think so.
Some self-indulgence here and there can develop your sexual repertoire, overall making you feel like a sexier person.
Plus, it's nice to know you don't need a man by your side every time you want to feel your legs shake.
7. It feels f*cking incredible.
No explanation necessary.
There are zero downsides to masturbation.
You can't catch an STD, you can't get pregnant and you're 100 percent certain to finish (which, let's admit, isn't always the case when hooking up with your man).
It boosts your health, makes you happier and feels damn good.
So do yourself a favor: Stop faking it during sex, and learn what works for you.