How can guarded and crazy both be bad? When did we decide that if a woman is secretive and quiet, she is wrong, yet if she is "obnoxious" and "dramatic," she's also wrong. It makes no sense. Unfortunately, that's the common plight of women.
A life surrounded by hypocrisy, women have learned the sad truth that no matter what we do, we'll never win.
Anything we say, feel or do will be labeled and stigmatized, creating stereotypes that are sexist, derogatory and shaming. If we sleep with them, we're easy. If we don't sleep with them, we're prudes. Which is worse?
Maybe women are insecure because, according to men, we're always doing something wrong.
Today, I'd like to talk about the plight of the "easy girl." A label that counters "the prude," and has its own collection of stigmas and unjust ramifications. But, what is an easy girl? How has society come to define her?
Most people will tell you that a girl who is easy is a girl who sleeps around. She's a woman without pride, class or honor. She's shameless and dirty and, worst of all, a woman who acts like a man.
Now, I don't know about you, but since when did wanting to have sex become so wrong? When did something as basic and primal as sex become so complicated?
Why have we decided to put so many restrictions, labels and stigmas around an act that's as primitive and natural as going to the bathroom? When did we decide that because a woman wants to have sex, she's a filthy whore?
You court us and try to get us into bed, then once we're there we're admonished for giving in. Giving in? Since when did taking part in an activity that requires two people to enjoy become something only one group is scorned for?
Doesn't anyone know that some women like sex just as much as men? Why should we be called easy for something that wouldn't happen without us?
In defense of all women who are having sex, have had sex or want to have sex, here are all the times we're called easy when we shouldn't have been:
1. When she wants to have sex like a man
Apparently, men don't like it when women do anything men can do. Women are not supposed to initiate sex, but run from it.
2. When she has sex on the first date
According to men, the entire point of the date was to get her into bed. If a man succeeds, he's the winner and she's the loser.
3. When she has sex before a date
We're supposed to be chased and courted and completely averse to any type of sexual act. If a woman doesn't play by the "standard" rules of getting a meal before sex, there's clearly something wrong with her.
4. When she has sex without any date
God forbid she doesn't feel like sitting across from you for an hour making lame small talk.
5. When she doesn't have sex with you
If she isn't sleeping with you, she must be sleeping with someone else. And this make-believe sex life of hers is enough evidence to contrive she must be a whore.
6. When she has sex with your friends and not you
If she's sleeping with anyone besides you, she definitely sleeps around. Because anyone who doesn't want to sleep with you clearly has something wrong with her.
7. When she dresses how she wants
According to men, women don't dress for themselves. They dress for men they don't know. So if they wear a mini skirt, clearly they are asking for something no lady should be looking for.
8. While you were sleeping with her
"Oh, that was easy." Did you ever think that women think the same thing about you? Only their thoughts are more along the lines of, "Oh, that was disappointing."
9. After three shots
She likes to drink, she must be easy. Contrary to popular belief, just because a woman likes to drink doesn't mean she wants to sleep with you. Did you ever think that maybe she's just thirsty?
10. When she’s nice to you
When she's cold, she's a b*tch. When she's nice, she's easy. Which would you like us to be? Oh, wait. What if we're neither?
11. When she tells you her real number
So you're allowed to like us, but we're not allowed to like you? Our options are one of two: give you our number and get scorned or give you a fake number and never see you to get scorned.
12. When she texts you first
So let me get this straight. If a woman shows any type of initiative or affection, she's a slut? What if she's just trying to skip the waiting and get on with it?
13. When she doesn't want to have a second date
Ever think she just doesn't like you? Just because you had sex doesn't mean she's automatically going to start planning your wedding... or even want to see you again.
14. When she doesn't make you chase her for six months
The chase might be fun for you, but it's exhausting for her. Mature women don't play games, and if keeping it real means being easy, then we don't want to be difficult.
15. When she moves on quickly after a relationship
Men have sex to get over a woman, women cry to get over men. What's wrong with this picture? Can't a woman have some break-up sex without everyone assuming she's trying to sleep with the entire tri-state area?
16. When she asks for it
How dare she!? Doesn't she know that only men are supposed to ask for it? Or, in some cases, demand it?
17. When she texts you after 2 am
So women aren't allowed to have a drink and try to sleep with you later? Since when did it become OK that only men get to reap the benefits of the booty call?
18. When she doesn't want you to stay
We know it's hard to tell your bros that she kicked you out, so let's just reverse it and say she's just a hoe. That stings less.
19. When she's more interested in sex than you are
I know it's hard to believe, but sometimes men aren't the only ones who can objectify. In a fair world, we could all objectify one another.
20. When she looks hot on Instagram
The ultimate catch-22. Don't look hot on Instagram, don't attract any men. Look hot on Instagram, get scorned for attracting men.