Snowboarder Goes Down Entire Mountain Without Knowing A Bear Is Chasing Her

Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t. Holy sh*t.

This is a video of 19-year-old Kelly Murphy escaping a f*cking bear at a Japanese resort while snowboarding. Holy sh*t is this footage surreal. She's comically oblivious and singing Rihanna the entire time while this mammoth bear is trying to straight-up "The Revenant" her.

I'm convinced this is how I will die -- not with a bear and snowboarding or anything like that, but just by me not paying attention while humming, "werk, werk, werk, werk, werk, werk, SHIMALAMAMA, werk, werk, werk, werk, werk, werk" in a dangerous situation, like swimming near a shark or walking by a Walmart on Black Friday. It'll be something real innocuous like that where I get absolutely DESTROYED by something 10 times my strength.

Citations: Sydney snowboarder claims she was chased by a bear at a Japanese resort but is the video the real deal (9 News)