This made me want to punch a hole straight through my computer.
Let me lay out a math equation for you gamer bros that's obvious to the rest of the world but kind of an enigma to the video game-loving community.
Sex > Video Games
NO! NO NO! SHHHHHHH! Stop whining for one second and let me explain -- not that I really should have to defend this piece of life-matics.
I play video games. I get it. Flashing lights, big explosions and guns are all great! Hell, you may even come across a female in a game with whom your character gets to have video game fun, which is exactly the problem.
Your CHARACTER gets to have VIDEO GAME fun with a VIDEO GAME lady -- not you, not actual fun and not real lady bits (the equation for this is lady bits > 64 bits).
No matter what you do in a video game, it's never going to be real. Video games are like owning the world's largest wax fruit collection when you should really just buy a bunch of fruits... AND NOT TURN THOSE FRUITS DOWN WHEN THEY WANT TO HAVE SEXY TIMES WITH YOUR PENIS.
This is not how you deal with a woman who is willing to touch your IRL joystick.
Sex! Great! Get it!
SHE NEEDS HELP TAKING IT OFF!
According to DudeComedy, this woman is RIGHTFULLY single nowadays.
Will someone not awful please get involved with this woman and then do stuff with her IRL?