Here's How To Avoid The LA Pride Traffic Apocalypse And Hang On To Your Sanity

Today's the day! LA Pride is in full swing, and in addition to signifying a celebration of love and acceptance, you know what that means: hellish traffic. As in, traffic straight from the sweaty pits of HELL.

It should come as no surprise that the streets are going to get a tad congested this weekend. For one, hundreds of thousands of people are expected to attend the event. Also, it's LA. Traffic is basically a nightmare here any day of the week.

Combine that with street closures, and you're likely to witness a car-pocalypse similar to the magnitude of Obama Jam 2014. Two years ago, when Barack Obama came to town, I spent six hours -- no joke, SIX hours -- driving the last two miles to my house. It took a bottle of wine, several joints and googling PTSD therapy, but eventually I recovered from that traumatic experience.

So be prepared this weekend. Whether you plan on attending all three days of LA Pride or avoiding the mayhem at all costs, coming up with a strategy is key to hanging onto your sanity. Study these street closures as reported by Curbed Los Angeles and commit them to your memory:

San Vicente Blvd (between Melrose Ave and Santa Monica Blvd) will be closed from 7:00pm on Thursday, June 9 through 10:00 am on Monday, June 13. Santa Monica Blvd (between Fairfax Ave and Doheny Dr) will be closed from 5:00am to 5:00pm on Sunday, June 12. Crescent Heights Blvd (between Romaine St and Fountain Ave) will be closed from 5:00am to 5:00pm on Sunday, June 12. Norton Ave (between Havenhurst Dr and Laurel Dr) will be closed from 5:00am to 5:00pm on Sunday, June 12. Streets one block north and one block south of Santa Monica Blvd (between Fairfax Ave and Doheny) will be closed from 5:00am to 5:00pm on Sunday, June 12.

If you can avoid cars altogether, that would be your best bet. Here are some free shuttle options provided by the city: Cityline X, PickUp Line and Hollywood Link. And here's a super handy little map of shuttle routes provided by The Source:

Stay safe, stay sane and don't forget to have fun this weekend!

Citations: Here's All the Street Closures for LA Pride This Weekend (Curbed LA)